TRIGGER WARNING: This story contains information about infant loss and about suicide, which may be triggering to some.
Rapper Machine Gun Kelly got a lot attention earlier this week for announcing he had new music coming out. He also got people talking by debuting a dramatic all-black tattoo covering nearly all of his upper body. Now that the song "Don't Let Me Go" has been released, some things about the tattoo makes more sense. It's clear Kelly has been going through some real feelings of guilt and grief following fiancée Megan Fox's 2022 miscarriage.
MGK, whose real name is Colson Baker, sings that his tattoo was the result of a breakdown and alludes to guilt for not being present when Megan had a miscarriage, showing a softer side of the rapper who has previously raised eyebrows for wearing Megan's blood around his neck, engaging in self-harm behavior, and being open about his drug use.
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In 2023, Megan revealed she'd experienced pregnancy loss.
MGK and Megan have had a tumultuous relationship since they started dating in 2020. They were engaged in 2022 but have broken up and gotten back together several times.
Although Megan has not shared when the miscarriage occurred, in November 2023 she spoke about it on Good Morning America. "I've never been through anything like that in my life. I have three kids, so it was very difficult for both of us and it sent us on a very wild journey together and separately…trying to navigate, 'What does this mean?' and 'Why did this happen?'"
In his song, MGK asks a hard question about the loss.
In the introspective new song, he talks about mental health struggles that led to getting his dramatic new tattoo, rapping this: Just like I wish they would understand me one time/I had a breakdown and tatted my entire body except one line." In the raw video, he references suicidal feelings while miming a gun to his head.
He also asks the lyrical question "How can I live with the fact/That my hand wasn't on her stomach when we lost the baby?"
Although Megan has three children from her previous marriage to Brian Austin Green and MGK has a daughter from a previous relationship, the pregnancy they lost would have been their first child together.
Megan also used art to process her feelings of loss.
In 2023, she released Pretty Boys Are Poisonous, a book of poetry that included passages that reflected her grief about the losing the pregnancy. In one poem, she writes, "There is an ultrasound by your side of the/bed … Do you think that if she could have/she would have left a suicide note?"
In another poem, she revisits the moment of loss, say "I close my eyes/and imagine/holding you tight against my chest/as they rip you from my insides… "I will pay any price/tell me please/what is the ransom/for her soul?"
The current status of the couple's relationship is unclear.
Although both MGS and Megan have clearly been trying to work through their feelings about the pregnancy loss, they also may have been working on their relationship.
The pair was spotted partying together in Las Vegas following the Super Bowl, and Entertainment Tonight reported that, according to an unnamed source, "Megan and Machine Gun Kelly have their ups and downs, as most couples do. They love so hard that sometimes things can be intense, but ultimately, they do their best to hear one another and better themselves. They both want a happy, loving, supportive, and honest relationship."
