We can all agree that nothing is a bigger bummer than realizing your wedding dreams cost money. Flowers, food, photographers … it can sometimes take big bucks to have a big affair. Of course, there are small ways that couples can cut down on their budget, such as trading out a big blow-out for a small party with close friends and family. Or at least in theory that's how it should work. As for one bride-to-be, she wrote that despite her protests, her mom keeps inviting more and more people to the party — and it's forcing her to go way over budget.
The bride ranted online that her mom has had a seriously hard time hearing the word no.
As she explained in a post on Reddit, her mom has been pressuring her to throw a more traditional wedding than what she wants. "Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people," the bride angrily wrote.
Not only does this bride want to shop for her dress with her fiancé, but she also doesn't want to wear makeup for her big day either "because of all the dancing I'm gonna be doing. She wants to hire a makeup artist; the makeup better be 100 percent water/sweatproof," she wrote.
The kicker was the guest list, which the bride was firmly set on keeping small. "I shortened my guest list to about 60 people to cut costs, so now it includes only A FEW of my friends in order to include my fiancé's family and my family," she explained. "Now my mom wants to add her family friends and their hubbies."
But the bride is not having it. "She can pay for them then," she wrote. Although she does have some reservations.
"Am I just looking for something to be upset about? Is this not a big deal because eventually she'll be out of my hair?" she asked. "I want the wedding to be about me and my hubby. Not about her and her memory of me. She can give suggestions but who has the final say should be me and my fiancé. She's not the one getting married."
Online, people were adamant that this bride put her foot down with her pushy mom.
Most people felt like the bride deserved to have the day of HER dreams.
"She had her wedding, why is she trying to take over yours?" one commenter asked.
Someone else wrote that if the bride is paying, mama should not get a say. "Who’s footing the bill for this shindig? If it’s NOT mom then she needs to butt out and you need to be more obstinate. Her dreams are not your vision," the commenter wrote.
"Tell her that you won't be inviting her guests, " a third person wrote. "You're having a small wedding. If she wants a party with her friends, she can host an engagement party or reception on her own. But you aren't going to host her friends at your small wedding. Stop discussing details with Mom. She doesn't need to know most of that stuff. She can see it all on your wedding day."
There was one person who thought maybe a compromise would get her mom off her back.
"What would happen if you gave her one thing that would be done her way? Not the guest list or wedding dress, but maybe flowers or decorating the church or hall???" the person asked.
That's a move the bride was willing to consider. "Hmm not sure. She’d make it look nice for sure. But that is the stuff she’s really good at," she wrote.
"If it’s stuff she’s good at and you’re okay with her doing it, ask her to do that, but tell her (tell, not ask) that you will decide how you look yourself (make up and dress) and who’s there to celebrate YOUR day," the same commenter responded.
We have to agree. Although the bride's day may not be a traditional wedding, it still seems like it will be a good time (so much dancing!). So mom may need to take a back seat and let the bride have the small, makeup-free affair she wants.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
