As cliché as it may sound, there is nothing more paramount to a relationship’s success than communication. To be in a fruitful partnership with someone, you have to be able to express your feelings, your thoughts, your grievances, and in many cases, your future plans.
When you unite your life with another person, you don’t want them to feel like you’re making decisions without considering them. But that’s exactly what one groom-to-be did. Sadly, it ended up costing him his fiancée.
More from CafeMom: 9 runway brides explain the simple reasons they ran
The OP's fiancé told her he had a gift before their wedding day.
A 30-year-old woman posted on Reddit to explain why she called off her wedding to her 32 year-old fiancé, Mark. She described Mark as creative and a bit unconventional. She wrote that he sometimes takes things too far in the name of a surprise or excitement. A couple of weeks ago, the two had a get together with friends to celebrate their upcoming nuptials.
Before the event, Mark told the OP that he had a surprise for her. She figured it would be “something sweet, like a heartfelt gift or maybe a romantic gesture.” She was wrong.
More from CafeMom: Bride Cancels Wedding & Dumps Fiancé After Guests Refuse To Pay Outrageous ‘Entrance Fee’
She was stunned by the gift ... and not in a good way.
Mark pulled out a box from a jewelry store. “My heart raced with excitement as I assumed it was a lovely bracelet or a special memento for our wedding day,” the OP wrote. “But when he opened the box, I was absolutely stunned. Inside was a key to a house he supposedly bought for us.”
The OP didn’t even know her betrothed was looking at real estate. The realization shocked her. She thought he should have spoken with her first before making a decision that big.
The house is a fixer-upper.
Eventually, the OP realized that this “gift” was more like a project. The house is a fixer-upper on the outskirts of town. “Now, I get that it can be a great investment, but this particular house needed a ton of work,” she explained. “I’m talking major renovations and repairs, and I honestly had no desire to live there.” She felt blindsided.
The fact that Mark had made such a huge commitment without discussing it felt like a violation of trust. The OP took the key and asked Mark to go outside with her to talk privately. Mark got defensive and insisted she was missing the bigger picture. The conversation turned into an argument. In the middle of it, the OP made the “gut-wrenching decision” to call off the wedding.
The OP decided to call off her wedding that night.
“Mark was devastated, and our friends were shocked,” she wrote. “I had just ruined what was supposed to be a happy night, and I felt horrible. Since then, Mark has been trying to reach out, saying he wishes we could talk it over, but I can’t shake the feeling that he disrespected my feelings and my input in our relationship. I’ve been reflecting on whether I overreacted. AITAH for calling off the wedding after his surprise ‘gift’?”
Reddit users agreed she was NTA.
After sharing a similar story about a rushed real-estate purchase, one Redditor wrote: “NEVER stay with somebody who is willing to do whatever they want without consulting you. It doesn’t work out and you will always resent them.”
Someone else mentioned the fact that if Mark bought this house in secret, his name is likely the only one on the deed. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but if he bought the house without you, then it is in his name,” one commenter pointed out. “He is the sole owner. But he wants you to help pay for the renovations? Nope. Bad move. If the marriage fails, it’s still his house and you’ll be left with nothing.”
Another seemed to sum up Mark and his antics clearly: “Some people really don’t understand that movies and tv are not real life. It sounds like Mark may be one of them.”
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
