The longer you live, the more you understand that life has highs and lows — but you never want to be judged for your journey. TikToker and life coach @themarissabaker, or Marissa Ann, has always been open about going through two divorces before she turned 30, in fact she seems to feel it is a strength. But when trolls started commenting on her page shaming her, Marissa wasn’t going to let them make her feel bad for what she’s been through.
The harsh comments came after a recent video on Marissa’s page, where she opened up about her current thoughts about marriage.
That is to say, the 30-year-old shared that marriage is definitely not at the top of her to-do list.
"People after I tell them I've been married and divorced twice before 30: 'Would you ever get married again?'" she wrote in the video’s text overlay.
She then starts dancing to a snippet of the cover of Elton John’s “Rocket Man.” Specifically the line, “And I think it's gonna be a long, long time.”
But let’s never say never.
“Followed by third times the charm,” she joked in the video’s caption.
The video has been watched over 600,000 times, and while Marissa should've been applauded for being able to make fun of herself, there were some people who couldn’t contain their judgmental comments.
Some commenters were downright ugly.
"Guarantee no one's asking you that anymore," wrote one person.
"Did being a life coach begin before or after the two failed marriages..?" another commenter asked.
"Life coach that’s been divorced twice….best joke I’ve heard all day," another commenter rudely wrote.
Other people came to her defense.
"My wife was 29 when I met her. She had been married twice. We've been together 32 years," one commenter wrote.
"We’ve all made some bad choices, don’t feel alone," another commenter added.
"Totally understand. Easier to be single. So enjoy being you," someone else wrote.
In a follow-up post, Marissa refused to let anyone make her feel bad.
“I share my story, all parts of my story, good, bad, and ugly, because I think it's important that people see the human in other people,” she said in the video from February 10. “We all have our stuff. None of us have it together. It's quite easy to judge someone for their life and the mistakes that they've made.”
“But I am quite literally shocked at the amount of people willing to judge a person without even knowing them,” she continued. “But that doesn't matter because people's opinions at this point are pretty irrelevant.”
“My point is, this page is about love and kindness, and love and kindness are the standard,” she added. “You don’t have to do anything to earn it. You don’t have to have your life tied up in a pretty little bow to be here.”
"Your mistakes don’t disqualify you," she said in a separate video, in response to a commenter who questioned her ability to be a life coach.
“If you have been paying any attention at all, any person who is coaching on something or has become an expert in something. A lot of the time, they are coaching on the thing that they've overcome,” she continued in a video from February 15.
“So what if — and here me out on this — your mistakes, not only do they not disqualify you, but they uniquely qualify you for what it is you're supposed to be doing and your purpose in this world?” she asked.
“So, yeah, maybe I could sit here and listen to these comments and be like, I'm not qualified,” she continued. “Or I could make the best of what I've been through and try to help other people that maybe don't see the light yet.”
“If you're going through something, or maybe you've been through something and feel disqualified, I just want to encourage you,” she added. “It's OK. We all make mistakes, and guess what? You're not disqualified. Actually, I'd say you're overqualified.”
