3 Things I Did To Stop Thinking About Losing Weight 24/7

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For most of my life, my mind was riddled with thoughts like “I wish I was skinnier” and “I would be happy if I lost a few pounds.” I believed weight loss was the linchpin to my happiness.

However, through years of healing the relationship with my body, I finally stopped thinking about my weight and size all the time. I realized these messages were coded into my brain from the day I was born.

As a woman, I was conditioned to conform to social expectations and to look and act for the approval of others. I wanted to be liked and had this intrinsic need to change my appearance so that it would attract the attention of others. Ultimately, it made me believe I was never going to be good enough.

To shed these toxic beliefs, I had to first understand where these thoughts came from and how to take action in managing them.

1. Set Boundaries on My Media Exposure

I was barely 10 when I flipped through my first beauty magazine. At a young age, I was already exposed to headlines such as “Shed Those Last 10 Pounds With This 30-Day Diet,” “4 Exercises to Sculpt Your Booty,” and “Drop 2 Sizes With This New Cleanse All The Celebrities Are Doing.”

It wasn’t just in magazines. It was in TV ads, radio commercials, and newspapers. And over the last decade, social media and filters were brainwashing me to believe that flat abs and a toned body weren’t just an expectation for celebrities: “real” people (influencers) make it seem possible.

First, I had to recognize and acknowledge that the messages the media is spreading are toxic. They do not reflect the reality of our diverse world. A healthy body can come in a variety of shapes and sizes. I do not need to have a thigh gap, cut abs, and a perky bottom in order to be fit.

I set boundaries on what media I was exposing myself to on a daily basis by unfollowing anyone who promoted fatphobia or diet culture.

2. Viewed Weight Loss as a Side Effect, Not a Health Outcome

Diet culture equates thinness to health and beauty. Growing up immersed in these beliefs, I thought the main reason people lose weight was to change the way they look.

The problem with this mentality is that it created a barrier to appreciating and accepting my body. When weight loss is the goal, it doesn’t allow me to fix the root causes of my unhappiness. It’s like giving a house a new coat of paint when the foundation is crumbling.

So I started viewing weight loss as a side effect that happens when I prioritize my physical health and emotional well-being. Instead of weighing myself every other day and getting upset at the scale, I focused on taking steps toward improving my health, like eating nutritious meals, exercising regularly, and getting sufficient sleep.

3. Stopped Talking Badly About My Body

I was using the word “should” about a dozen times every day.

I’d wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and tell myself, “I should have a flatter belly.”

I’d put my pants on and I would tell myself, “I shouldn’t have eaten that second bowl of pasta last night.”

I was doing it so often that I didn’t even realize it was happening. I kept judging and comparing myself to these impossible standards. I believed it was completely normal to constantly belittle myself whenever I wasn’t doing or feeling what I “should” be doing or feeling.

I started using different language when talking about my body. I stopped using words like fat, ugly, big, round, and chubby that physically described my body and emotionally triggered me.

Instead, I honored myself exactly as I am, and treated my body with kindness and compassion. I tell myself I am strong, unstoppable, powerful, and confident.

I no longer care about weight loss because I learned to appreciate the different shapes and sizes that human beings come in and redefined what I love about myself not based on social expectations, beauty standards, the media, or anything except what’s true to me.