Few parenting topics can light up the internet faster than a social media post on extended co-sleeping. Heck, even admitting to merely room-sharing with your kids can unleash a tidal wave of criticism from those who say the practice is "unhealthy" or "wrong." But Brandon Janous isn't concerned with parenting sleep critics right now. At the moment, the father of three is focused on one thing and one thing only: supporting his kids through one of the hardest times in their lives. For him, that means letting them sleep on his floor … every single night.
Janous recently shared a photo of his nightly routine on Instagram.
In the snapshot, all three of his kids — who range in age from about 7 to 11 — are seen sleeping on his bedroom floor. Each of them is lying in a different position, stretched out on temporary "beds" made from blankets and pillows.
But regardless of what impression the photo gives you, the caption is bound to take you by surprise. Because right away, it becomes pretty clear this dad isn't just trying to stir up some online parenting debate. Instead, he's merely sharing how he and his kids are managing to survive.
"We live in a 4 bedroom home. And this is us. Every night and every morning. This is us," Janous wrote.
"I used to fight it," he admitted. "I used to tell them that this wasn’t healthy. I’d tell them that they’d get better rest in their own beds. To give it a chance. That their beds are more comfortable than my floor. It never worked. No matter what I said."
The busy single dad lives and works in Knoxville, Tennessee, with his three kids.
They include two daughters, Hadley Mae and Cooper Grace, and a son, Macklin Lawrence.
According to his Instagram account, Janous described himself as a "believer, writer, and a storyteller." He also happens to be the co-founder of BeautyText, a subscription service that offers great deals on makeup, health, and skin care products.
But until March 1, 2020, Janous also had one other title he held near and dear to his heart: devoted husband.
It was then that Janous lost his wife of just under 10 years after a difficult battle with cancer.
In her online obituary, Rachel Marie Janous is remembered as a loving mother, a loving wife, and an incredible nurse who spent her days caring for others and living her life to its absolute fullest.
When she was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2018, she vowed she would do everything to fight it, and she did. But when the cancer returned and spread throughout her body, it was clear that she might not beat it after all.
It's been more than two years since Rachel passed away, but the grief still exists.
Janous writes about it often on social media, where he confesses that life as a widower is an ongoing journey.
But that's also why he shows his children such compassion as they process their own grief. And whether it's "controversial" or not, it's also why he lets them sleep on the floor of his room each and every night.
After all, it's something he had to do too while trying to come to terms with Rachel's death.
"Two February’s ago, I spent each night, on the floor, next to Rachel's hospital bed," Janous wrote in his Instagram post. "People tried to tell me to go home. To get some rest. To give it a chance. That my bed would be more comfortable than the floor. It never worked. No matter what they said."
"It took me almost two years, but I get it now," he continued. "No one was going to convince me to leave her side. No matter what anyone said, by her side is where I was going to be. There was no place where I felt more safe, than on the floor, right next to her."
With that in mind, he no longer questions why his kids still feel the need to sleep near him at night.
It's become their new norm — and as far as he's concerned, that's OK.
"I don’t fight it anymore," Janous shared in his now-viral post. "It’s been almost two years since they lost their mommy. In that time, it’s become pretty clear that by my side is where they are going to be. And that to them, no place feels more safe, than on the floor, right next to me."
In response, hundreds of people flooded the comments section of the post to lend their support.
Many of them included fellow widowers or grieving parents, who understood this situation all too well.
"My husband died 18 months ago," one mom shared. "My 7- and 10-year-old are with [me] every night. I don’t fight it, either. It is what it is. Grieving kids need to feel safe."
"My boys slept with me every night after my late husband died," another mom commented. "I was never one of those 'family bed' type of moms, but they needed that comfort and so did I.
"You are a wonderful dad, Brandon!" the mother added, telling him that his photo "represents love and safety."
Even a few "experts" weighed in on the matter.
"I am a psychotherapist for kids," one user wrote. "Four years ago, I too would have ranted to you about how this is unhealthy, you need boundaries, the kids will be fine. I then lost my brother and wife within a few years of each other."
"Do this for however long they want to," the person added. "They are telling you where they feel safest. I would give anything in the world to have this."
