Woman Confronts Teen She Found Sleeping in Her Yard & Sparks a Life-Changing Conversation

A recently divorced mom of two’s reaction to an unhoused person sleeping in her yard has gone viral. Many people have praised the mom for her compassion, though she believes she has “done the bare minimum,” she told People.

In a video shared on TikTok, Elly explained that after she saw a teenage boy sleeping outside of her home in Washington state, she decided to leave a note along with a tote bag containing a blanket, pillow, cans of soup, spoons, and other resources. In a series of videos, she continued to document what happened next.

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After Elly made eye contact with the boy one day, she decided to leave a note.

Elly shared her first video about the situation on September 10. In the video, she explained that she had seen the boy around before and that he “is always respectful” and “doesn’t talk to anyone, he reads, he eats his snacks, and just rests.” At first, she thought he might be a student. One day, she “noticed this boy getting comfortable on [her] stoop” and “made eye contact” as she walked into her home.

She decided to leave food, a blanket, and basic toiletries for the unhoused boy. In her note to him, she told him that he could put anything he needed to have washed in a bag and she would wash it and leave it for him outside. When she wrote the note, she wrote it in both English and Spanish, and tried to make sure that it didn’t sound like “a trap.”

“I was trying to walk a fine line between making this available to him without any strings attached,” Elly told People. “I’m doing it because I see you, and if this benefits you, great. If you want to continue sleeping on the stoop, that’s fine too.”

The note he wrote in response 'destroyed' Elly.

@ellayyyyee idk if this was the right thing 🤷🏻‍♀️ ive never had a vagrant youth live on my lawn before. #carepackage #essentials #grwmhair #ootds ♬ original sound - ellayyyyee

After leaving the note for the unhoused boy, Elly received a note from him. In the note, he explained that someone had stolen a bag that had his clothes in it and he only had one outfit to wear.

“Obviously that destroyed me,” Elly explained on TikTok. “I was reading the note with my own two little boys like running around. They are 6 and 5 and I’m recently divorced.”

She joked that because she’s divorced, she couldn’t “rob hubby” and had to “rob” her ex-husband instead by calling him and asking him to give her any spare clothing that he might have. While Elly understood that the unhoused teen might need other resources, she wanted to make sure that he was washed and clothed first.

My No. 1 goal is to help him to feel safe,” she explained in a video, adding that “tertiary to that would be then to introduce the correct resource.”

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The mom of two wanted to be both 'realistic' and 'kind' at the same time.

@ellayyyyee Replying to @Stella’smom he made contact! unhoused boy living in my yard wrote me a note 😭 #unhoused #homeless #youthhomelessness #greenscreen ♬ original sound - ellayyyyee

After Elly started documenting this experience on TikTok, people offered different suggestions. However, in a follow-up video, Elly explained that she was trying to approach the situation with “kindness” while also paying attention to “accessibility.” Some people had suggested that Elly purchase a gym membership so the unhoused boy could use the gym showers, but Elly said that the boy did not have transportation.

Part of the reason that helping the unhoused boy felt so important to Elly is because of her own experience growing up. “I myself was a foster kid. I did not have the best upbringing, but here I am, and much by the grace of the charity of others,” she explained in a video. “I have a very successful life with all of my needs met. It is very difficult for me to see this boy and not see myself. And he needs help.”

At the end of October, Elly spoke to the unhoused teen face-to-face and realized he needed more help.

@ellayyyyee Replying to @Trademeproject New notes on doors, things in bags — it’s been an eventful 3 days! #unhoused #youthhomelessness #homeless #carepackage #essentials ♬ original sound - ellayyyyee

On October 20, Elly replied to a comment that read, “Are you ok? Haven’t made a video since September. Should we be concerned?” Elly said the video was “not a fun one,” but she was safe.

Around the time that she shared the video, Elly started to have concerns about the unhoused teen’s well-being, based on his behavior. She had a 90-minute conversation with him and learned more about the complex nature of everything he was dealing with. In her video, she was somewhat vague about what he was dealing with to protect his privacy.

The conversation made her realize that he needed more help, so she began searching for resources and making calls. She communicated with him about the next steps, letting him know that he could no longer stay outside her home.

“The things he’s facing were never gonna be solved with a backpack, they were never gonna be solved with an Amazon wishlist, they were never gonna be solved with a back porch with a house,” she explained in an emotional video. 

People praised her for the way she treated the unhoused teen with compassion and respect.

On TikTok, Elly received a large number of positive comments in response to her videos.

“I work in this field – u did the right things,” one person wrote. “We are trained to learn the limits of ourselves, our programming &service; & to refer onto the next level of service when it’s outside our capacity 🩷.”

Another person wrote, “You showed him kindness when a lot of people probably don’t.” Elly replied to the comment with, “It’s uniquely heartbreaking to watch someone so young struggle with so many tragic life circumstances, stacked on top of addiction.”

“Thank you so much for seeing his humanity and treating him so kindly,” one TikTok user commented on one of Elly’s videos. “This is a tough situation. He is lucky to have come across you.”

'I don't know where this guy's story is going to lead.'

@ellayyyyee An action-packed end to the tale, with lots of lessons learned along the way. #unhoused #homeless #youthhomelessness #outreach ♬ original sound - ellayyyyee

Reflecting on the situation in her fifth and final update, Elly said that she has “learned so much.” “I’ve been helping in a way that I’ve hoped has walked the line between respect and autonomy, kindness and realistic expectation,” she said. “I don’t know where this guy’s story is going to lead.”

“I’m obviously saddened that he decided not to take advantage of help,” she continued. “He may forever remember me as the b—- who gave all of his items away and made his life harder. But I knew from the beginning that I wanted to connect him with resources, and I did.”

Speaking to People, Elly said her kids asked her about why she was leaving a note for the unhoused teen. “I try to have conversations with my children about noticing things and putting themselves in someone else’s shoes,” she explained to the publication. “Ultimately, I hope that’s what people take away from my experience.”