So you've been tasked with throwing a baby shower, and you want it to be ah-mazing for your BFF. We feel you. The only problem is, whenever you think of baby showers in general, the first image that springs to mind is of a boring, ladies-only brunch full of painful small talk and weird shower games — and that's just not your friend's style. (Or yours, for that matter.)
Our advice? To heck with all of it! Throw a baby shower that your friend will actually feel good about by skipping the "rules" and traditions you think you have to abide by, and opting instead to throw a party that's much more personal.
Here's our take on seven baby shower "rules" that are actually worth breaking …
Rule 1: Only women should be invited.
"That's a silly and outdated tradition!" says Megan Frisbee, a brand ambassador with GigSalad.com, an online marketplace of over 50,000 entertainers for hire across the US and Canada. "Since when isn't the father of the baby included?"
Instead of going the old-school route of an all-women guest list, Frisbee suggests including both parents-to-be by throwing a co-ed shower with men and women of all ages. She suggests a fun themed party like "a BabyQ" (barbecue), which will bring everyone together to celebrate the future little one.
Rule 2: Baby shower games are a nonnegotiable.
Who hasn't been subjected to awful baby shower games like "Taste the Poo," which consists of sniffing various melted candy bars inside diapers? While plenty of people still find these games fun, a growing number of us tend to find it G-R-O-S-S.
"They're meant to be fun, but more often than not, it feels more forced," Frisbee tells CafeMom.
If the mom-to-be just isn't feeling it, nix those corny games altogether and give the shower guests a little break. Instead, have them write down their best parenting advice and/or horror stories in a scrapbook. It's still fun for guests, and will be way more useful for the parents-to-be in the long-run.
Rule 3: A shower should really be hosted at somebody's home.
"Traditionally, baby showers are hosted in someone’s home, but this is an easy one to break," says Frisbee. "Why not reserve a room at a local coffee shop, a quaint winery, or even a cute creperie?"
It may be a bit more money to rent out a private space, but the stress it'll take off your shoulders will be priceless. Think about it: You won’t have to worry about obsessively cleaning your house, shopping for endless groceries, or having to cook or cater. Instead, all you'll have to do is book the venue and do a little pre-party decorating.
"The last thing you need is more stress," says Frisbee, "so give yourself a break. Let someone else do the dirty work!"
Rule 4: The best time for a shower is on Sunday afternoon.
Says who?!
"With the hectic schedules and never-ending to-do list that most people have, spending three hours on Saturday or Sunday at a baby shower is not something to look forward to," says Simone Jones Tyner, an event planner and blogger at SimoneJonesTyner.com.
Instead, consider hosting the baby shower during Happy Hour one weeknight after work or even on a Friday evening. You can also do an "open house" event and carve out a block of time that guests can stop into the party, chat with the expectant parents, and enjoy some snacks.
This way, they can skip all the corny games and fuss of a traditional shower, and roll out when they want to, says Tyner.
Rule 5: No alcohol.
"A lot of baby showers don't have alcohol because the mother-to-be can't drink," says Limor Suss, a lifestyle expert and the founder of TrendsGirl.com.
While you definitely want to make sure to have mocktail options at the shower for the mom-to-be and any other guests who may not drink, you don't have to go alcohol-free across the board. In fact, the majority of shower guests will probably appreciate a glass of bubbly, some wine, or a mimosa.
Rule 6: Girls = Pink, Boys = Blue.
It's about time we nip this one in the bud, says Tyner, who notes that there's "a world of color out there" that often gets ignored during baby showers.
"Why just limit your baby shower to the traditional colors of pink and blue?" she asks. "Get creative with color schemes like yellow and gray, teal and orange, or even aqua and red."
It will be much more interesting this way (not to mention photogenic!).
Rule 7: You have to open gifts at the shower.
Let's be honest: This can sometimes feel like the longest and most tedious part of the shower. (Especially since most guests are well aware of what's on the mom-to-be's registry.)
Tyner couldn't agree more.
"It's so boring," she tells CafeMom.com. After all, "How many times can you 'ooh' and 'ahh' at a onesie?"
She definitely has a point there. But there might also be one other thing to consider when it comes to opening gifts in front of everyone: Depending on your guest list, it could lead to some uncomfortable comparisons between how much some people were able to spend on a gift versus others.
So, if the mom-to-be isn't really into the whole never-ending gift opening thing, don't force it on her! Simply have her thank guests for their generous gifts before the party ends, and she can open them on her own time at home — when she's comfy in her PJs and nothing feels rushed.