Nursing a child is a natural, normal, and healthy choice, but for some strange reason, breastfeeding brings out the worst in people. Either they say a mom is breastfeeding when she should be bottle-feeding, she's nursing in public when it should be done in private, or poor mama is doing it for way too long (or not long enough). How could any woman win? That is the question Tennessee birth photographer Nicki Kaylor asked herself and nine other volunteers in her recent photo project, Latched With Love.
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In the series, Kaylor asked mothers to reveal the rudest, harshest, and most ridiculous things people have said to them while they were trying to feed their child, and unfortunately, the answers may not be shocking. The stigma against mothers who breastfeed in public is real. And these were real mothers who were targeted by both strangers and people close to them. Kaylor spoke with CafeMom about her now-viral project and her ultimate goal of stopping breastfeeding shame.
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As she says in her original Facebook post, "Mothers who breastfeed should be APPLAUDED. Not judged nor stared at. Breastfeeding is PURE. Breastfeeding is BEAUTIFUL. Breastfeeding is NATURAL." We couldn't agree more! The stigma needs to stop, and perhaps projects like these will get the conversation moving forward.
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Read on for some stories and photos of brave and beautiful breastfeeding mamas — and get ready to feel incredibly inspired.
"Can You Go to the Bathroom?"
People love to comment on what nursing moms are doing, and that's exactly what inspired Kaylor to let nursing moms speak their truths. "I put this series together because there's so much judgment against mothers nursing their babies in public," Nicki tells CafeMom. "I did this as a movement. Simply to normalize breastfeeding."
"You're Still Nursing!?"
This mom told Kaylor she was shamed for nursing her child "too long." As most moms know, how long you nurse your baby is a hot-button issue, even though it shouldn't be. Every child is different, and the decision is personal.
"Isn't He Too Big?"
Nicki says she found the volunteers for her photo series by reaching out to moms on Facebook. She tells CafeMom, "I created an event called 'Latched with Love' on Facebook and asked everyone to tag any breastfeeding mothers they knew. And I ended up with nine awesome mamas! They were happy to be a part of this."
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"Are You Serious?!"
People can be incredibly rude when a mom has to nurse on the fly. As Kaylor tells us, "Absolutely no mother should be in public feeling ashamed because her baby is hungry and she has to feed it."
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"You Should Use a Blanket."
People love telling nursing moms to "cover up," but as Kaylor tells CafeMom, "… It's okay to nurse your baby in public even if you don't have something to cover up with." And we agree! Moms and their babies should be able to nurse comfortably, no matter where they are.
"It's Easier to Give Him a Bottle."
Sigh. Bottle-feeding is a valid choice, but if a mother chooses to breastfeed, she most likely knows what's "easier" for her — and she doesn't need anyone else's opinions. Breastfeeding is a conscious choice and needs to be respected as such.
"You Should Cover Up."
This beautiful picture says it all. A happy mom with her happy child, looking carefree. In her Facebook post, Kaylor says, "The judgment and awkward stares against breastfeeding need to end."
"How Long Are You Going to Do That?"
"Nurturing your child from your body is something SO special," Kaylor writes on Facebook. "It's not as easy as everyone thinks. It takes a lot of determination. From constant nursing, comfort nursing, the let down, hearing a child cry in the store and your breast fill up with milk even though it's not your child … (YES! that happens!) Mothers who breastfeed should be APPLAUDED. Not judged nor stared at." Say it again!
"You Should Stop, She Has Teeth..."
"If you see a mother nursing her child in public, please do not approach her with rude words," writes Kaylor. "Smile and continue on your way or tell her how AWESOME she is!"
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"Bring Husbands Next Time."
Even this bold dad got in on the action to show his unwavering support for breastfeeding moms.
Happy Babies
Regardless of what anyone else thinks, these moms' babies are happy and healthy. And that's what really matters.
The Brave Moms Who Breastfeed
Kaylor also got all the moms together for a group shot. On Facebook, her enthusiasm is contagious. She writes, "If you nurse, I want you to know how PROUD I am of you. Nursing is a job all in itself. You could have easily quit and switched to bottles, but the determination has you where you are today: NURSING. You ROCK!"
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A Hopeful Beginning
Kaylor tells CafeMom, "I hope anyone who sees my series comes to the realization that [breastfeeding] is just a mother feeding her child, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. It should not be frowned upon. It's normal. It's natural. It's beautiful."