Yesterday I went to a bridal shower pool party and had to leave my Tata Top at home to be respectful of grandparents, buuuut it left me without a swimsuit. Thankfully my girlfriend had an extra one-piece which was NOT made for someone 34 weeks pregnant.
I’m 99 percent sure this was more inappropriate.
It turned her gorgeous suit into a wrestling thong slinglet on my preggo bod so I waddled around like this instead. Own it, amiright?
To top it off, there was also a catered Chipotle buffet … I literally ate 12 tacos minimum. No bull.
I went back for fourths. I also made myself a to-go container that I snuck out when I left and ate in my car.
I had contractions kicking up all day while in my thongkini, and they got closer together by the time I made it home -- and I wound up in labor and delivery.
All I could think about was: "Is this seriously the last bump pic I’ll have?" And "Holy crap I am going to poo ALL OVER this hospital if I go into labor because I just ate 9 pounds of Mexican food."
The nurses asked if I did anything out of the usual during the day and I kept answering "No," followed up with my husband whispering, "Chipotle" every time.
And I really didn’t want them to diagnose me with Chipotle intoxication so I silenced him. Now I’m back home on bed-rest dreaming of burritos and thankful this taco is still cooking.
Maybe it was from the enormous pressure the slinglet put on my lady bits … maybe it was tacos … the world will never know.
This post was written by Sydney of Strollin With My Homies and reprinted with permission.
