Dear family,
You wanna know why I break down over dinner time? You wanna know why? Well I’ll tell you why.
Because I know I like to make food appear like it hasn’t been a grueling process, but it is.
Grueling? Yeah. I said it. Cooking isn’t just cooking.
It is planning, looking for ingredients, organizing, shopping, battling Susan at Aldi because she has four items less than me and wants to go in front. It’s having eggplants thrown at me fast and hard by an angry check out assistant. It’s cooking it, making it look good, and running out to the store because someone ate the cheese because they don’t just call it Mac n F—ing nothing do they?
It’s opening a fridge or cupboard and thinking about what to cook with those ingredients. Do I have enough? Am I missing something?
Do I have enough money to buy fancy cheese? Will there be leftovers? Should I freeze them? And how long the leftovers will keep? Will they eat it? WILL THEY LIKE IT? Who won’t eat it? If I make it too yellow will my 5-year-old have a hernia because it looks like it’s been touched by a vegetable? Do I have enough time to cook? Or does it have to be speedy? Who’s hungry? Is it healthy enough? And who will wash up? Me again?
This is over and over for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Every day.
It’s added to the long list of the mental load that we carry that drives us crazy.
And given that yeah, we are in 2019, but women are the majority of ones who cook every night. Females are socialized to not only cook, but to love it because we are nurturing and giving and homey. So it makes sense that someone who has practiced doing it, would be the one to do it … and it’s understandable that when the 5-year-old screams, "yuk," the 3-year-old is angry, there isn’t enough, and the husband ate some biscuits because it took too long, you feel personally attacked … and then you plot murder.
Cheers to the dinner makers!
This post was written by Laura Mazza of Mum on the Run and reprinted with permission.