Blended family life isn't easy during the best of times, but during a health care crisis that involves isolation, it can be totally hellish. Families have had to get super creative with what they can do to keep everyone safe and healthy, and although that is a challenge in and of itself, it's especially tough when kids are "going through it." When are forced to separate form one of their parents, they have to get creative about quality time.
For a dad on Reddit who was used to picking up his 14-year-old son every day after school, the shift has been particularly tough. His solution? A 45-minute nightly FaceTime session. The only problem is dad's girlfriend is really annoyed by it, and the dad doesn't know what to do about it.
The dad explained that his son is having some anger issues, and he can get through to the boy when his mom (dad's ex-wife) can't.
So every evening at 7 he hops on FaceTime with him for roughly 45 minutes to just chat, go over school work, and more.
The problem is his girlfriend thinks this is "taking up a lot of time" and wants to eat dinner with the dad at 7 p.m.
The dad tried accommodating his girlfriend by asking his son to switch the time.
Dad suggested 4 p.m., but his ex-wife informed him that their son does his online religious school then, and when he asked about 8 p.m., his son said he has a nightly ritual of watching the sun set with his stepfather.
"Basically what I’m saying is, 7 pm works best for him and since he’s the child, I want to help him out as much as I can," the dad wrote.
So the father asked his adult girlfriend to compromise
Apparently his 8 p.m. suggestion didn't go over well.
"Needless to say my girlfriend said I was being selfish and dramatic and that it wouldn’t hurt to tell my son ‘no, 8 pm is better for me’ because ‘standing in the garden looking at the sky is a weak excuse’ to not want that time utilized."
So dad wanted to know: Do his girlfriend's accusations have any weight?
People told him to throw the girlfriend out -- literally.
"Throw the whole girlfriend away," advised one reader. "Anyone who wants you to put them before your child isn't someone you should want to be with."
One commenter cautioned this might not be a black and white situation.
"It’s a balance. No one wants to always be second to a child either, that’s not healthy or sustainable for a relationship. Sometimes the child should be second instead of them dictating the relationship," the person wrote. "But these are extenuating circumstances."
Others with blended family members also chimed in.
"Yeah my mother in arms (is that not the best term for amazing step-moms ever!?) would never ask for this. The 4 of us parents work together to raise our kids. NTA you need to see your kids now more than ever … be it video chat or face to face, it's a rough time in the world and no one has starved to death 1 hour after 'dinner time.'"
It sounds like the dad has some important priorities to address — and soon.
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