No matter how much you painstakingly plan it, if the baby is on his or her way, your delivery is pretty much out of your hands. But try telling that to one woman's mother-in-law, who was livid with her when she wouldn't wait for her before she went off to the hospital to give birth.
The mom was 31 weeks pregnant with her fourth child when it happened.
Her husband, who works at a hospital an hour away, can be hard to reach while he's at work, she explained in a post on Mumsnet. And her MIL has been at all of her deliveries in the past. Grandma told the mom that she wanted to be at this one too, but the ongoing health crisis has made things complicated.
This time, there will only be one person allowed in the delivery room besides the mom because of social-distancing regulations.
It seemed as if they were all in agreement about the new plan for when she went into labor: Her husband would be her plus one and her MIL agreed to watch the rest of her kids because she lives "a stones throw" from their house.
Their plans went out the window, however, once the mom's water broke -- nine weeks early.
It happened a little after 8 p.m., weeks before her due date. Her daughters were already in bed and she couldn't get in touch with her husband who was at work, so she called her MIL to see if she could watch her daughters while she went to the hospital.
"I told her how my waters had broken and I was struggling to get hold of Dear Husband, could she come and watch the girls ASAP, as I needed to go to the hospital to get help as it's far too early for the baby to come," she wrote.
But her MIL asked if the mom could hold tight because she "just got out the bath."
"I told her 'no it can't wait, the longer I wait the less chance I've got of them stopping it and baby will be born far too early,'" the mom recalled.
Her MIL didn't want to hear it, however. Instead she "huffed and puffed" and told the mom that she would "get there when she can."
The mom waited 25 minutes for her MIL before she called her back.
This time her MIL didn't even pick up.
"I was now having contractions," she wrote. "So I had to ring my brother-in-law and ask him to help me please."
Her BIL and his girlfriend immediately came over, and she watched the kids while her BIL drove her to the hospital.
"[He] stayed with me until DH got there just after half 10," she wrote.
Her MIL didn't show up at her house until 10 that night.
Grandma arrived two hours after the mom originally called her and for some reason was fuming that the mom didn't wait for her to get there to go to the hospital.
"I've now had a massive amount of texts from MIL saying how she can't believe I didn't wait," the mom wrote. "'I'm out of order! How dare I let that child look after her grandchildren! I'm a disgrace it's not that bad if baby was to be born! I'm over reacting! Etc etc etc.'"
In the mom's defense, her BIL's girlfriend is a 25-year-old nursing student — not a child, "so they were perfectly safe."
The mom has yet to give birth, but she's absolutely ticked that her MIL took her sweet time getting to her and then chose to lay blame on her for not waiting around.
"When I got to the hospital I was 4 cm dilated, they managed to stop the contractions eventually but I'm still 5 cm dilated and I've got to stay in until it's safe to deliver the baby," she continued. "They hope to get me to 34 weeks, but there is only so much they can do."
"Am I being unreasonable to be mad at MIL?" she asked.
The comment section seemed to believe her MIL was just acting out because she was caught red-handed.
"She has behaved so, so badly," one person commented. "I would honestly block her number and just have your DH deal with her from now on. So sorry you are going through this, I hope you and your baby stay well."
"No of course you're not, she's been caught out and is looking bad so she's trying to blame you," a second person agreed. "I'd let her get on with it."
"What stupid, selfish behavior," a third person chimed in. "In that situation any delay is dangerous."
Later in the thread, the mom wrote that her MIL tried to explain that she took so long to get to her house because "she fell asleep on the bed."
"I know she has been working more hours recently and she is more tired than usual but she has never treated me like this," she wrote.
For now, their relationship is done.
"DH has told her that she needs to stay away until I'm ready to talk to her again," she continued.
Right now, that might be what's best.
