
It can be hard to raise a kid on your own, especially if you're young and struggling. One young dad has been shouldering the responsibility for his 4-year-old all by himself for years — working hard to make ends meet. But now, his child's mother is back in the picture, and he's wondering if it would be wrong to ask for all of those child support payments that she missed.
The baby was the result of a young "friends-with-benefit type thing" with a girl a few grades ahead of the dad.

"You know how these things go, dumb kids messing about, don't take proper precautions, she ends up pregnant," he explained in a since-deleted Reddit post.
The mom "insisted" that they keep the baby and "was excited throughout the pregnancy."
Until their baby was a month old — then she dropped off the face of the earth.
"She dropped him off for a weekend with me then was a no-show for pick up on Monday and was unreachable until late in the night," he explained, "when she informed me she'd moved to the other side of the country for university and wouldn't be coming back."
Then she blocked all contact and cut the dad and baby out of her life completely.
Those were rough, rough times for the dad. His parents kicked him and his baby out of the house, he had to put any plans for college and his career on hold, and he really struggled to make enough money to support the two of them.
Now, almost four years later, his ex has finished college.
And she's looking to becoming a part of their lives again.
"I'm apprehensive. For one, I can't shake the feeling that if she could abandon our kid before, she could do it again. And two, I'm a little put out that she's been completely no contact and uninvolved — including not paying child support — for his entire life, and now thinks she can breeze back in because it's convenient now," he continued.
He won't stop her from seeing their son, but he really does wonder if he should press her to pay up on all of the money she owes him for raising their son on his own.
Many people advised the dad to make sure to get everything in writing and consult a lawyer.
"I say this from experience: NTA, but lawyer up. NOW," one commenter suggested. "You want your custody set in legal stone and her complete and total abandonment of your child documented in court yesterday so that you have legal standing to fully dictate the terms of her coming back into your lives."
"She could try for full custody claiming her better financial situation makes her the more stable parent. Document everything," someone else agreed. "You aren't an a–hole for asking her to have the barest parental responsibility (fiscal). She's proven that was too much for her. Protect yourself and your kid."
A third person had this advice: "Also, you can ask her for back child support, but cannot legally force her to pay it. From experience, the order will only start once you file for child support. Literally that day."
Bringing in lawyers can be a scary and difficult process, but this dad should consider at least getting an agreement in writing and consulting a lawyer before moving forward.
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