We donât talk about pregnancy loss, stillbirths, or miscarriages enough as a society. For as often as they happen in the world (in 15 to 20% of pregnancies) they are relatively taboo when it comes to conversation topics. If we canât speak about this type of grief with other adults who may have experienced it, weâre surely not sharing this with the children who come after the miscarriages â our rainbow babies. But one mom in Central Maine learned that not only were her children were extremely interested in this family story, they already had their own understanding of rainbow babies.
Sadie’s kids felt she should have told them about her miscarriage.
Sadie Trask, a real estate agent in Central Maine, recently deviated from her job as an entrepreneur to share a sweet story about her children. Recording a video in her car, she said: âMy kids recently found out that Payton, our oldest, is a rainbow baby.â This bit of family history came out during a conversation with grandma. âThey were very offended that I withheld that information from them,â Sadie said.
Sadie didn’t think her children would care.
Grandma was very apologetic about being the one to break the news. She didnât know the children werenât aware and didnât think it would be such a big deal to them. But it was. Sadie didnât realize that they cared. But they did. And they had questions.
âThey were like, âWhy didnât you tell us?ââ Sadie said, recounting their reaction. Sadie assured them that she wasnât hiding it from them but she planned on sharing it with them when they were older. “It was our very first pregnancy 13 years ago,” she said in an interview with Newsweek.
The kids learned about rainbow babies from a popular children’s show.
But then she had a question for her children. âHow the heck do you know what a rainbow baby is anyway?â They told her that Bluey, the famous Australian cartoon dog, is a rainbow baby. The message is not an explicit one. Itâs one aimed at the parents watching along with their children.
The notion of Bluey being a rainbow baby came in a Bluey episode called âThe Show.“ In it, Bluey and her younger sister, Bingo, are putting on a Motherâs Day performance for their mom Chilli. The show consists of the two dogs reenacting scenes from their parentsâ dating and married life. In one moment, Bingo pretends to be pregnant, stuffing a balloon under her shirt. But the energy shifts when the balloon pops. Bandit, Bingo, and Blueyâs father, reaches over and grabs Chilliâs hand to comfort her. While the creators of the cartoon never publicly confirmed that Bluey is a rainbow baby, parents were clear about the message. Many people spoke about this unique moment on TikTok.Â
After Sadie told this story, other women opened up as well.
Sadieâs kids were distraught to learn their own mother had had a similar experience. But with this information on the table, they were able to ask her questions and she got a chance to speak about the baby she lost.
Her video made space for other women to share as well. âI told my twin sons they were my rainbow babies a few years ago when they were about 13,â one IG mom wrote. âThey were sad she didn’t make it, but said it helped understand me better, and why I’m always sad in October when she would have been due.â
Another woman offered another perspective. âI am a rainbow baby and for years Iâve loved the idea that I have a brother or sister that I will meet in heaven one day. Not sure why this meant so much to me but itâs comforting for sure.â
