Today I vowed to give myself a break, to enjoy a “lazy Sunday.” But as usual, my brain was filled with too many thoughts. Seemingly mundane things that to the outside world wouldn’t seem necessary and yet to me and our family, they are.
I tried to sit still and enjoy the weight of my 2-year-old daughter in my lap as we were watching the same Bounce Patrol video for the one millionth time, but no. For the overworked and full head of a mom, an empty brain without thoughts of how to fill every second is nearly impossible.
I kept thinking about how I should clean the kitchen.
I thought about how I needed to do the laundry. I remember I needed to put away my daughters’ clothing that she had outgrown. I thought about how I wanted to cook some fruit for snack time.
I just kept thinking. Here I was, relaxing with my daughter, and instead of being in the moment and enjoying the peace of her actually being happy to just sit in my arms and do nothing, all I could think about how for me, doing nothing seems impossible.
I really wanted to attempt to have a lazy day. I truly did.
My family and I live in Puglia in the south of Italy, where we have been on a newly imposed lockdown for the past week. To make matters worse, the first week has been very rough, with rain and high winds every day, making our daily walks impossible.
We filled our week with games, reading, crafts, cooking, bath time, etc. Besides taking care of my daughter and the household chores, I also spent my time working. So today, I really wanted to relax and try to let the weight of the past week wear off.
I even decided that on this particular evening, we would get takeout.
Really go all out with the “lazy Sunday.” And then, in the back of my head, I thought “why takeout? There is already so much food in the refrigerator. Why spend the money when I can easily throw together dinner?”
Being a mom means learning when to stop and stay still and for many of us, that seems impossible.
Why?
Because moms never stop.
We’re fearless. We’re ruthless. We’re powerhouses. We’re unstoppable. While the tasks of being a mom might seem relatively “light” to the outside world of non-mothers, there are literally a hundred million ways that a mother fills her day. For those of us that were already like this pre-motherhood, it’s now even harder finding a better balance and knowing when to allow yourself to slow down.
Moms, such as myself, seem to be incapable of just sitting still and doing nothing, because in our heads, there is always something to be done. Whether for ourselves, our children, our spouses, or the household, it’s sometimes impossible to not think about what we could or should be doing.
However, we must find a way to just stop.
Stop all the motions. Stop and sit still. Stop and slow down. Stop and just relax. I know, I know, I feel like a hypocrite for even suggesting that, since for myself, relax is just a word.
We mothers need to remember that in due time, things will get done. Because moms can handle literally anything. They always do and they always will.
