12 Brutally Honest Rules for Dating a Single Mom
There are approximately 10 million single moms in the United States, which means that the odds are pretty good that at least some of them are looking for love. Not all of them, of course, but the ones who are often have some hard and fast rules for dating that are a little different than from before they had kids. And they have to be! We chatted with single moms who were willing to let us know the deal when it comes to dating as a single parent.
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If dating as a single person can be a messy combination of fun and frustrating, dating as a single mom poses its own unique challenges. From figuring out if a guy is into kids, how to talk to children about dating, and knowing when to date after a divorce -- there are so many tricky ins-and-outs of dating while a parent. We asked some brutally honest single moms to tell us the truth about what they want prospective dates to know before they try to get together with them. From rules about sleepovers, body shaming, and meeting the kid, they didn't hold anything back. Take a look at the rules that these moms came up with -- TBH, they make a whole lot of sense to us!
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Second Fiddle
"Anyone who wants to date me needs to know that he is always going to be my second, maybe third, priority. My kids come first, and my job is a close second since I have to support my kids. I want to be in a relationship, but not if it messes things up for my kids." -- Ashley R., Lawrence, Kansas
Meeting My Son
"My kid is pretty great, but you don't get to meet him unless you are around for the long haul. If you ask to meet him and I say 'no', that means I'm not sure about you yet." -- Latrice P., Rochester, Minnesota
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It Works or It Doesn't
"I think the biggest difference between dating before I had a kid and dating now is that I have no patience for drama or game playing. I used to spend months wondering if someone was right for me and playing all the games. Now I just don't have the time or energy for that. It is either working or not. If it isn't working, I'm quicker to pull the plug now than I was before." -- Patti S., Austin, Texas
Baby Daddy
"Believe it or not, I'm not looking for a father for my kid. I'm looking for a partner for me. If we work, then we can talk about whether you'll be a part of my kid's life. Don't just assume I'm dying for someone to be a father figure. He has a dad and it isn't you." -- Annie E., Des Moines, Iowa
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Kid Friendly
"This should be obvious, but don't date me if you don't like kids. Ideally, if this goes well, you'd be in my kid's life on some level, so even if you think I'm great, don't ask me out if you aren't okay with the thought of sharing your life with a kid someday." -- Britta B., Minneapolis, Minnesota