The decision to add children to a family is one no parent should take lightly, even when you already have one or two. Every addition to the family brings a shift, one that impacts not just the parents in question, but the other children as well. That is why it is pretty imperative that parents are on the same page when it comes to kids, but in reality sometimes they just aren't.
Unfortunately for one husband and father on Reddit, his wife was laser focused on getting the amount of kids she wanted.
"I'm not sure what she did is the actual definition of baby trap, she didn't have a kid to make me stay, just against my will," the dad begins.
He described his life as fairly picturesque. He and his wife of eight years have two children he adores, but the dad explained that he even originally compromised by having two instead of one. Now that he and his wife are over the hump of his son's sleepless baby years, the dad assumed they were just going to move forward with their little family as is.
"When he [his son] was a year old, my wife began casually mentioning a third. I would laugh it off but finally she sat me down and said we have to have a third. I said no, we agreed on two, but she said she wanted four and three is the compromise. I refused and said I wanted one and we have two. She got angry and called me selfish for taking away her dream of wanting a big family."
A few days later he claims his wife apologized, and they "did the deed." From that point, he noticed her drive increased, and he was happy to engage,
"Thinking back on it, I probably should have figured something was up, but I was barely handling two little kids and work on top of housework and yard work and everything," he confessed.
One day while the kids were at their grandparents' place, he came home from work to find his wife with a huge smile on her face. She sat him down, showed him a positive pregnancy test, and literally danced for joy.
Shocks and upset, the dead couldn't control his less-than-enthused face, and his wife lost it on him.
Feeling immediately guilty, he apologized and told her he was of course excited for the baby, though he was confused as they had been using birth control and condoms for protection. She immediately forgave him. She started calling friends and family to tell them the happy news.
Later that evening she started divulging her plans to convert his office into a third room … and that's when he got suspicious.
"Everything was so well thought-out and it seemed like she'd been planning this for a while," he wrote.
As she slept, he pulled the protection from the cupboard they stashed it in and found holes were all poked through ... and found out she stopped BC.
After confronting her and having her stay with her parents, the current isolation restrictions in place had her returning home. Even though she keep trying to get him excited for the baby, all he can do to stay calm is to ignore her.
"I don't trust her anymore," he wrote. "She entirely betrayed it. I'm angry."
Now, he doesn't know what to do; should he stay with her and weather through it, or leave her even though he has another child on the way?
People had one reaction: RUN
"It’d be a 100% deal breaker for me," commiserated one commenter. "The lying, the manipulation, and leveraging your kids. No going back from that."
Of course, even though many people said he's entitled to feel however he does toward his wife, he shouldn't blame the baby.
"First, you have to flush out your anger/resentment/bitterness toward your third child," advised one reader. "That is an absolute must, ASAP. The situation clearly justifies your anger at your (for now) wife. You have to separate those things in your mind. As mad as you are about the circumstances, I think it will be important for you to force your mind to be excited to meet the child you didn’t necessarily 'want.'"
Here's to hoping that this family can get to a space where they can function peacefully.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
