There are few moments in your life that you can't get back – and the moment that your baby is born is one of them. But one man decided that because he was already running late for the birth of his daughter, he might as well take his sweet time getting to the hospital. If that wasn't bad enough, his wife wasn't just angry that he basically blew off the birth of their baby – she was furious over who he was with when it happened: his female best friend.
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Yes, the woman's husband and his female BFF used to date, but they've been platonic friends for a while.
Up until this point, the wife had no problems with their friendship. But then she went into labor.
"On the day that I gave birth, [Best Friend's] brother got into a car accident," she wrote on Reddit's Am I The A–hole forum. "My husband got a call from her in the middle of the night and asked him if he could drop her at the hospital her brother was at (an hour away from us) since she was too scared to drive."
So, seeing as how this was his BFF, he agreed. He "told me quickly while I was half-asleep and rushed out," the OP added.
A few hours later, her contractions started and her husband didn't pick up his phone.
Eventually, she gave up and called her dad, who drove her to the hospital instead.
"I was so scared of giving birth alone since I've had about three miscarriages and one stillborn," she wrote. "My husband promised me that no matter what, he'd be there for me. Guess what? He wasn't."
They kept trying to get her husband on the phone – but he didn't pick up until the OP was giving birth.
He told her father that "that he'd misplaced his phone in the chaos."
"My dad informed him that no matter how fast he drives anymore, he's going to miss the birth of his child," she recalled.
"Well, my husband took that as 'he's already screwed up, so it doesn't matter when he shows up at this point' so when he FINALLY came, our daughter was about five hours old and I'd already moved to the maternity ward," she added.
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Yeah, that was a BIG mistake.
It was so big that when he finally did make it over to the hospital, the OP refused to let him see their new baby.
"I was so high on emotions and was shaking when I saw him and didn't want it negatively affect my time with the baby," she added. "I wanted her birth to be a happy time and I was already struggling to feed her."
Her husband was 'in a bad state' and begged to be allowed to see his newborn.
Eventually she gave in and held the baby up to the window so he could see her.
"I told him to then leave and he'll be allowed to interact with the baby at my father's home when we're both well and out of the hospital and that I was most likely divorcing him," she continued.
Then her husband started bawling. He was SO sorry that he missed this moment.
He tried to explain. His bestie's brother was in serious critical condition and although he's fine now, his BFF "needed him."
"Though [best friend's] parents were there, she's not that close with them and she was in an unbearable state," she explained.
But the OP wasn't having it. She couldn't care less about where her husband was – he wasn't there when she needed him.
"I'm putting my daughter's and my health first and won't let her be sidelined. My husband agreed and left," she wrote.
Later, his best friend called the new mom and told her that she was being controlling.
She said she'd never met anyone as cruel as the OP "for not letting a father see his baby. I told her that my husband made his decision and that this was his doing not mine."
"But now, I can't help feel cruel in my actions and feel like I'm depriving my baby of both her parents being together. My husband sees her a few hours each day now. Am I the A–hole?" she asked.
People in the comments agreed – this was not a good sign.
"Let's ignore the fact that he ran to her rescue in the middle of the night while you were that far along in your pregnancy," one commenter pointed out. "Any decent husband would make sure to have his phone on him 24/7 when not at home with a wife about to give birth. As soon as he found out you were in labor, he should have rushed to be with you.
"I am not a jealous person, but there is no way I would tolerate his behavior and his obvious putting [Best Friend] before you," the person continued. "I would seriously be considering divorce as well. Marriage counseling at a bare minimum. I would also be concerned about his feelings/relationship with [Best Friend]."
"I absolutely cannot get over him calling and complaining to [Best Friend] and telling her about this," someone else agreed.
"And then [Best Friend] actually had enough nerve to call OP & lecture her! WTF?! OP is absolutely Not the A–hole," a third commenter added.
The thing is, this really was a sign that something was off with their relationship.
Eventually the OP got around to reaching out to her husband's best friend's brother to see how he was doing, which is when he dropped the bomb.
"He asked about me and the baby and how I was doing with the split and if I was okay with my husband and … [Best Friend]."
"I can't believe I was so oblivious."
The truth is that the BFF's family thought she and her husband split up when she was seven months pregnant "and that [Best Friend] and him were back on."
"He showed up at the hospital as [Best Friend's] boyfriend which is why they didn't bat an eye that he was there and not with his pregnant wife. Because apparently we split," she added.
To make matters worse, "her brothers procedures were done well before the afternoon." So it's still unclear what exactly they were doing while she was going into labor.
"So the divorce is probably going to happen," she wrote. "My brother is looking at lawyers for me."
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