Learning that your significant other is pregnant for the first time is one of those unforgettable moments, but for one man on Reddit, the news left him in shock for an entirely unexpected reason. As he explains in his post, he's been sterile for years — meaning that he can't biologically father children of his own. That's why his girlfriend's surprise baby news was … more than a little upsetting.
According to the man, an accident in college left him unable to have children.
He's been pretty private about it ever since.
"None of my family members know of this," he wrote in his Reddit post. "They know about the accident but not about this. I have always wanted to be childfree so it did not affect me much mentally."
The Southeast Asian man is 24, and he admits that he's never really dated until now. Instead, he's spent the last few years finishing up his master's degree and getting a high-paying job straight out of school.
"My parents immediately wanted me to get married after getting a job, but I wanted to work on myself and explore a bit," he shared. "They said no and I said that it was my wish."
The disagreement caused quite a bit of friction with his super-strict parents.
"All my life I did what they wanted and for the first time when I talked against them, they were not happy," he continued. "This was last year and they gave up after COVID started."
Since then, he's tried his hand at some dating apps — unfortunately, with no luck. So when his parents introduced him to a family friend who seemed nice, he gave it a chance. And lo and behold, they clicked right away.
Looking back now, though, he feels like "a fool."
Because of his inexperience with dating, he likely missed some telltale signs that look a bit different now in hindsight.
"She said 'yes' to anything I said and never complained about anything," the man shared. "I felt kinda weird about it. I wanted her to express her interests, but she always said she was interested in whatever I do."
At the time, he didn't think much of it, and he let himself fall further for her. He even opened up about a lot of personal stuff.
"I said I won't have kids ever and she surprisingly said OK," the man explained. "I was like damn, she is probably The One as it is very hard to find a partner who is childfree in my country (or at least I thought), but we were in the initial stages and I had not told [her] about my accident."
Then, about a month ago, the pair finally slept together.
He wanted to be safe, so he was sure to use a condom. And as far as he knew, things went pretty well.
That is, until she started ghosting him.
"I thought it was due to my performance in bed and wanted to give her some space," he wrote. "Then she texted infrequently and only replied OKs and Ks and one-line answers. I thought maybe she wanted to end the relationship and was sad but left it at that."
Except apparently, things were far from over.
"Yesterday, all her family came to my house and she claims shes pregnant and the father is me," he wrote.
To say the man was shocked would be quite the understatement.
"I freaked the [expletive] out and wanted to collapse on the ground," he shared.
Meanwhile, the family began talking about marriage, as well as everything that needs to happen now, after he got her pregnant.
In short, he felt totally blindsided.
But considering he used a condom and they only had sex once, he was also pretty confused.
Redditors were quick to jump on this one.
After all, it could only mean one of three things: Either the new girlfriend cheated on him, he wasn't actually sterile, or — craziest option of all — she was lying.
"1. Get tested to see if you are sterile," wrote one person. "2. IF she is pregnant get the baby tested. 3. Make plans accordingly if you are the father or not. 4. On a final note … you may need to step away from your family for your own health."
(That last one might be the most accurate statement of all.)
Some people did point out that being ruled "sterile" isn't always 100%.
"I'm a 29-year-old female and was told 10 years ago that I am sterile and my husband had a verry low chance of having children," one person shared. "We now have a 5-month-old son. So it is possible."
"Yep," added someone else. "My neighbor was told at 37 she didn't have to worry about having anymore kids. She's 41 [and] I'm babysitting their 16-month-old right now."
"They told my dad that he was sterile and two years later I was born," yet another person wrote. "It's very possible."
A lot of people strongly urged him not to marry the woman.
"DO NOT get married and it's time to step away from your family," one person advised. "You need to tell them the truth about your inability to have children, assuming that is still the case. She was probably pregnant before you guys were together and slept with you so she could peg you as the dad. Definitely get the baby tested. In addition to your sperm count."
And, the person added, "If your parents blame you for your inability to have kids, it’s time to part ways."
But others remained highly skeptical ...
In an update to the post, the man answered everyone's burning questions.
His first move was to call up some clinics and get tested himself to see if he was, in fact, sterile. Then he went to a nearby store, bought a few pregnancy tests, and asked the woman to come over the following day. In the meantime, he called his parents and before he could so much as utter one word, his mother asked him if he "had any good news."
"I was shocked by what she said and asked what exactly she was talking about," he wrote in the update. "She then played dumb and I knew that the situation was more [expletive] than I thought."
The next day, the woman came over. But she wasn't alone — she had her parents in tow.
"They were under the impression that I was gonna discuss engagement plans with them," he said. "I told them to wait outside and called her in and they threw a fit. I told [them] they can all go back or let her alone come in, they said OK."
Needless to say, it was all pretty awkward.
But little did he know, that was only the beginning …
"I took out the pregnancy tests and gave it to her and told her to prove that she was actually pregnant and told her where the bathroom was," he recalled.
Spoiler alert: This did not go over well.
"She started screaming at me (never done this before, I was shocked at this), then she went out the door and called her parents in," he wrote. "Now everyone is screaming at me in my own home because I asked her to prove the pregnancy not even a DNA test."
An hour after he made them leave, the man's parents came over.
To his shock, the girlfriend and her parents also appeared, and that's when the you-know-what really hit the fan.
Long story short: It was all one big lie.
"She was never actually pregnant (as many Redditors said)," the man shared. "My parents were afraid that I was getting old for marriage and wanted me to marry and give them grandchildren. They said that in arranged marriages, there is no need for the people to actually get to know the spouse because parents choose only the best for their kids."
Little did he know this had all been strategically schemed from the start.
"They planned this all and were only waiting for me to have sex with her to do this," he wrote.
He was floored.
"I broke down and cried again," the man admitted. "All my life, I did exactly what my parents wanted, always scored high and never asked for anything. I told them to get out and never talk to me again in between crying and they said parents know whats best for their kids and I should do what they say. Then I got extremely angry and told them to [expletive] themselves in my native language, which was very bad."
Although the "plan" may have been well intentioned, it clearly crossed the line.
In the end, it blew up right in everyone's faces.
"For once, I think [my parents] knew I was serious with them and they all left," the man shared. "I blocked them all before sending my parents a message to never again contact me in my life even if one of you is dying."
Honestly, as insane as this entire confrontation may have looked, we've got to applaud this guy for sticking to his guns in a truly ridiculous situation. No one deserves to be controlled — let alone by parents — and no one should enter marriage under a lie.
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