What to Know
Sometimes, it takes dads to talk some sense into other men about how to talk about pregnant women’s bodies (or, for that matter, how not to talk about them). Maybe we would prefer it if they would just listen to us, when we are pregnant and when we aren’t, but the clarity of a new dad is no joke, and one new dad on TikTok by the name of Korab Idrizi shared a video where he tells men to just stop commenting on pregnant women’s bodies already. Because seriously, how do we need to keep having this conversation?
Korab says in his video that it isn’t anyone else’s place, though more specifically a man’s place, to comment on someone’s body “just because it’s different now.” Honestly, Korab, please say it for the men in the back. You know, the ones who tend to hide behind their social media profile pictures that are way too up close and at horrible angles? Yeah, those are the ones.
The dad says a pregnant woman’s partner should be the “calming presence” around her.
@korabidrizi You support your child by supporting your wife through pregnancy and delivery. Be the calming presence she can rely on while everything around her is shifting. #laboranddelivery #parents #psychology ♬ original sound – Korab Idrizi | M.S.
Korab explains in his video that his wife gave birth to their daughter five weeks ago, and in that time, he has learned a thing or two about being a supportive husband and father. One thing, he notes, is that people, including men and “boomers,” need to stop focusing so much on what pregnant women look like and then commenting on those looks.
“This one’s probably more for the boomers and anyone else, but please stop commenting on pregnant women’s bodies,” he says. “The amount of times people made inappropriate comments on my wife’s body while she was pregnant was insane. People said things like, ‘you look way bigger than you should be for how far along you are. You look like you’re pregnant with twins.’ I mean, those aren’t compliments. I don’t know if they sound like compliments to you, but they’re not. Sometimes even attempts to compliment come off in a really wrong way. So just stop. Like, it’s not your place to comment on someone’s body just because it’s different now.”
He also says that, should your pregnant partner want a natural birth and then opt for an epidural, it’s your job to support that. As he says in his video, this is the woman’s pain and her body going through this. The time for judgments, especially if choosing an epidural at the last possible minute is a quick decision, is not now. Or even later, for that matter.
Korab adds, “It is on you to be a very calming presence throughout that entire process.”
Other users commented on his TikTok to applaud him for saying what needs to be said to men who feel the need to talk about women’s bodies during pregnancy. One even joked that his video is “the opposite of rage bait” and instead can be referred to as “hope bait.” That might be something we need to get trending on social media.
Another joked, “The bar is so low when we’re salivating over this!” But that’s because, in a sea of men who continually do not get it, this one does, on a visceral, if obvious, level.
He ends his video with some words of wisdom to husbands and dads everywhere to just support their wife or partner after she has a baby. That’s it. That’s the secret to being a good partner. Wild, right?
