It's no secret that sex before marriage is a major no-no in the Mormon faith. But one woman who's since split from the church says that doesn't stop couples from getting intimate before they say "I Do." In fact, the ex-Mormon recently shared a TikTok video spilling all the tea on the growing trend called "soaking" — in which a man penetrates a woman but doesn't actually make any movements.
TikToker Lexie McDonald first broke it down in a video she shared earlier this year.
"Soaking is when you have a man who just 'sticks it in' and let's it soak," she explained in a video she shared back in March.
It usually occurs between teens or college-aged couples.
"The idea behind it is if it's just in but there's no moving back and forth, no movement, then it's not a sin," she continued.
(In other words, God won't judge you.)
Confused? You're certainly not alone.
There's a reason the TikTok now has more than 11 million views and countless comments from people who clearly find the whole thing to be … a little out there? Somewhat hypocritical? All of the above?
“This sounds like a bigger scam than just the tip,” one person commented.
“Just taking her temperature!” another person joked. “No big deal.”
“Does it come out wrinkled like fingers after a long bath?” someone else asked.
(DEAD.)
@exmolex Reply to @user5465489459629 soaking ##exmormon ##exmormonhumor ##exmormontiktok ##provo ##provoutah ##byu ##exmo ##exlds ##soaking ##excult ##cult ##mormons
McDonald did attempt to explain the logic behind it but had a hard time stifling her laughter, considering how nuts it all sounds.
"Young Mormons — usually like teenage to college student age — are very sexually repressed,” she explained. "Because obviously, they're not allowed to touch themselves, they’re not allowed to look at anything sexual, they’re not even allowed to hug or kiss anybody for an extended period of time."
That said, she admits that it sometimes gets to a point where “they just can’t help themselves."
Hence, the creation of "soaking" (Which is sometimes called "parking," "marinating," or the "Provo Float."
If the couple holds still and there's no thrusting on either part, then somehow it doesn't "count," and the girl remains a virgin.
"It sounds like I'm making it up," McDonald said with a laugh in the clip. "But I promise you, this is a thing that happens every day in Provo, Utah."
McDonald should know, because she herself has done it.
Though the content creator now lives in Idaho, she was born and raised as a Mormon in Provo but left the church with her now-husband at 25. But before they did, they too gave the "soaking" trend a whirl.
"This is probably the same for all people who've participated in soaking — it's not like we are dumb enough to believe soaking isn't sex," she told BuzzFeed last week.
Instead, it all goes much, much deeper than that. (Pun intended.)
"Mormons are taught in the past that sexual sin is the sin next to murder," McDonald explained. "So within the church, teens and young people have a lot of shame and guilt about having any sort of sexual thoughts at all. Basically, they've been taught since the very beginning of the church that sexual purity is super important and to have anyone else partake in your body is a sin."
Now that she's left that whole world behind, McDonald tries to educate people on the dangers of the church through TikTok.
"I feel like the church is really damaging for people in the way it teaches about sex," she told BuzzFeed. "I’ve been talking about it online and I still have trouble talking about some things, like even saying the word 'masturbation' is hard for me because it’s been so ingrained in me [that it's sinful]."
In some of her TikToks, she shares how upset family members have been by her decision to leave the church, as well as what they believe to be her "sinful" behavior.
@exmolex Reply to @chrisshai435 so many tears have been shed over our evil choices ##exmormon ##exmo ##exlds ##exmormonhumor ##exmormontiktok ##exmormoncommunity
In other clips, she pokes fun at her former life in a lighthearted and humorous way.
@exmolex ##exmormon ##exmormonhumor ##exlds ##exmormontiktok ##exmormoncheck ##exmormoncommunity ##excult ##cult ##cultsupport ##funny
As wild as her stories sound, they've been confirmed by many other "exmos" who've left the church.
And as far as the whole "soaking" trend goes, some say that Mormon teens have actually taken things one step further — with something called "jump soaking" or "jump humping."
Essentially, it's the practice of soaking but with an added twist: While the male is penetrating the female, a friend stands on the bed and — quite literally — jumps up and down to create movement.
As long as the couple isn't thrusting/grinding/rocking themselves, this is somehow seen as a loophole too.
@funeralpotatoslut Did you know if someone else jumps on the bed, the movement doesn’t count? ##notallheros ##exmormon ##soaking ##soaktok ##hiatus ##backatit ##mormonshit##exmo
