Students Caught Masturbating in School Shouldn’t Be Punished

I know this will come as a shock — a shock! — to some of you, but little kids have sexual curiosity. They explore. They play "doctor." And, gasp, they masturbate. In fact, nine students at a San Diego middle school have been suspended after other classmates reported that they were watching porn on their cell phones and masturbating.

Reportedly, this is an all-boys school. Since it's middle school, I guess the boys are around 11-13 years old. Besides the fact that kids are tech-savvy enough these days to stream porn on their phones, is there anything really shocking about this? Movies are chock full of scenes of boys around this age doing the deed with dad's well-worn Playboy stash.

I'm certainly not saying the boys shouldn't be suspended. (Read that again.) School is a time for learning — and not about one's genitals. It's a time for math, English, science — not for Jenna Jameson. And if, as the report says, several students raised their hands to report the activity but the teacher ignored them while continuing to read a book (maybe it was Fifty Shades of Grey?) then this is wrong. Obvs! I get that!

But this is natural behavior, y'all. I bet a few of you — at least a few — have found evidence of your precious offspring doing the solo mambo. My sincerest hope is that these kids don't get a thorough drubbing at home by their parents for what is natural activity. Do we really need these kids growing up with all kinds of emotional trauma around sexual activity? That leads to no good.

If I were the parents of these children, I would explain calmly but firmly that there is a time and a place for figuring out the pleasures of the body. And that time and place is NOT the classroom. Then I'd do some research on what books about sex to hand the curious tykes so they're getting their information from somewhere other than YouPorn. (I just did a search on "children's sex books" — yikes!)

What would you say to your kid if he or she was caught masturbating in school?

Image via Stephen DePolo/Flickr