About a year ago my son drew a spaceship that looked so astoundingly similar to a penis I was almost embarrassed to pick up the paper in order to praise his artwork. It even had “laser blasts” emanating from the tip of its head, er, nose cone. Plus there was a “space guy” floating nearby at an awkward location and what I’m saying is that I really, really wish I could find the photo I took of that damn drawing because it would fit in PERFECTLY with this collection of outrageous kid drawings I’ve put together.
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From blush-worthy adaptations of human anatomy to the best misspellings we’ve ever seen, this list of 15 unintentionally funny kid creations should improve this day by at least 78 percent. What can we say? Kids don’t know what they’re drawing is dirty. They’re just writing and doodling away earnestly into naughty territory, which is what makes is so funny. Plus, it gives us plenty of fuel to embarrass them when they’re older.
We HAVE to share these hilarious drawings with our closest friends. And I’ll definitely keep them in mind the next time my child draws a very squiggly peni — I mean, rocket ship. Enjoy! And may we suggest not drinking beverages while perusing these wonderful kid art catastrophes.
Freudian school supplies
Well, of course it is. You dirty bird.
Where Breaking Bad meets elementary school
I bet these kids get a LOT done during Mrs. Edwards’ Special Meth Circle Time.
Happy birthday, Daddy! We got you a giant severed penis.
This child’s mom writes, “For my husband’s birthday, I asked my 5 year old Bex to draw a picture for his Daddy. This is a picture of Bex himself and images from the park, where his Daddy takes him. That long tubular thing is a slide, I swear! And those two ball things on the side are…oh, I have no idea.”
I love how you WHAT?
Before there was Damn You Autocorrect, there were amazingly awesome kid misspellings.
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But what about Mommy?
The hat. THE HAT. *dies*
And H is for Hooters (owls)
The little smiley face is the cherry on the tits sundae.
Unusual zoo specimen
It’s a GIRAFFE, you guys. Come on, get it together.
Tasty snack
I’ve been staring at this one for ten minutes and I can’t figure out what the kid actually meant. Is that a chair? Wait, maybe a grill? Dad’s meat = steaks? Anyway, the results are fantastic.
Feel bedr soon, that dick injury sounds hairy
I’m thinking poor Ms. Karen fell off a deck, but who can say for sure?
Pencils down, kids: this is the best drawing I have ever seen
Mom explains this HILARIOUS drawing thusly: “I want to be very clear on my child’s illustration. It is NOT of me on a dance pole on a stage in a strip joint. I work at Home Depot and had commented to my daughter how much money we made in the recent snowstorm. This photo is of me selling a shovel.”
Santa & Satan (twinsies!)
The real question is — is that an apple next to Santa Satan? Because last time I checked, Santa eats cookies.
Deformed apples
Stems, shafts, same thing.
Put down the hose!
Oh sweet ignorance.
Feeling busty are we?
If the first day looks like this, I can’t wait to see what the teacher wears to parent/ teacher conferences.
Longest. Tail. Ever.
A mind of its own, that tail.
