7 of the Strangest Things on My Homebirth Supplies List

I absolutely love everything about the idea of giving birth to my third baby at home. Everything from having my two older children close to me to having a midwife who responds to me as a human being and respects the body and it's natural process is wonderful. I would recommend it to anyone.

But it is a little weird. This is a fact my husband and I have been especially aware of over the past several weeks during which we have been procuring our very strange list of home birth supplies as provided by my midwife.

The list might seem normal to anyone who has had a home birth, but my first two were hospital births and let me tell you, I needed NONE of these things. Here is a list of 7 of the weirdest parts of my home-birth list:

A Fish Net

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James Emery /Flickr

A fish net: What in the HELL is this for? Will we be fishing in the birthing tub? What could POSSIBLY need to be plucked out of the tub with a net. Oh wait…  On second though, my husband may want to rethink getting in.

Garden Hose

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Barret Anspach /Flickr

A hose: My conversation at Home Depot went much like this: Me: "Can you help me find the hoses? Just buying a hose in winter. With an adapter. To have my baby. In a tub. In our house." Helpful employee: "Yeah, I am not sure we sell hoses for that." Me, looking at my list: "Just a garden hose will do." Him: "Yeah, that's aisle 47. Right next to the weed killers."

Incontinence Pads

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SCA Svenska Cellulosa... /Flickr

Incontinence pads: My husband: "can you please roam the incontinence aisle instead of making me do it." Did you know they make underwear for incontinence? Now I do. I feel SUPER sexy.

Picnic Table Cloth

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Vinyl picnic table cloths: Because it's a picnic! We will pretend it's summer and dine on grapes and cheese and forget there is a BABY COMING OUT OF ME. Oh wait, no. It's just for under the birthing tub. Natch.

Witch Hazel

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Witch Hazel: My husband: "What the hell is this? Should I be afraid? Will there be spells involved?"

A Plastic Garbage Pail

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Garbage pail: Husband: "This would almost be a normal purchase. If it weren't solely for placing the placenta in after birth." True, true.

Strainer

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Hey Paul /Flickr

Strainer: Me: "Will we be making pasta in this birth?" Nope. Turns out this is for herbs. What kind of herbs? Stay tuned!