Work-at-home moms, aka WAHMs, seem to have it good: They earn a paycheck and they get to spend time with their kids, or at least pick them up from school and grab an ice cream on occasion — in yoga pants no less. Yet we're going to let you in on a little secret: This seemingly idyllic scenario barely scratches the surface of what it's really like to work at home when you have kids. To give you a glimpse of what it's really like, we asked moms to spill the beans on their deepest, darkest, dirtiest work-at-home confessions.
OMG, #14 is SO embarrassing! Has that happened to you?
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Forget About Pajamas, WAHMS Work Au Naturel!
"I have been naked during meetings."
They Come Up With Weird Pastimes for their Kids
"I used to have my daughter sit on the floor under my desk with markers and color in my ankle tattoo. She would last about 30 minutes or so and I had some quiet time to get some work done."
They Angle Their Skype to Hide the Truth
"I placed my desk directly in front of a white blank wall so that my clients can only see a white wall on Skype and think I'm in an actual offsite office. It helps that they can't see the shelf in front of me that has my collection of Fifty Shades of Grey along with artwork from my 2 -year-old."
They Breastfeed While They Work
"The biggest skill I mastered was breastfeeding while working on my computer and taking calls! Yes, it's true, I worked and breastfed at the same time. I nursed both my last two easily at my computer sitting on the couch or in front of my desk. This is thanks to many of the great contraptions that exist, one being the Rockin Baby Sling!! Clients on the phone never have a clue."
They Send Their Kids Outside, Sometimes With Disastrous Results
"I often send my kids out to play while I take calls from editors. But it does have its downsides: One time, I saw my younger one remove his dirty diaper and slide down the slide, making a real mess while I was frantically shaking my head 'no' at him and trying to focus on what the editor was saying."
They Houseclean During Conference Calls
"Sometimes I put conference calls on mute and do my laundry so nobody can hear me. "
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They Beautify on the Boss's Time
"Sometimes I work on reports and do pitching with an egg yolk mask on my face. "
They Pretend They Work at an Office
"When I drop my son off at school, I'll often wear 4-inch heels, just to pretend like I work in an office setting. It keeps me more focused."
They Indulge in Weird Ways
"Sometimes while I'm working home alone all day, I eat all the frosting off a cupcake, then throw the cake part away."
They Care for Sick Kids
"If my nanny calls in sick and if I don’t have any scheduled conference calls, I won’t tell anyone that I don’t have childcare that day and I’ll work off my smartphone and during naps."
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They Take Calls in the Tub
"Toward the end of my pregnancy, I needed a little 'me' time and I took a 30-minute call from my bathtub. I used my relaxing voice to soothe my client. It was a WIN all around."
Their Kids Get Away With Murder
"My oldest son comes home from school at 3:30 and I'm not finished working until 5, so I let him play video games and eat whatever he wants after school as long as he doesn't interrupt mommy."
They Hide From Their Kids
"To finish my calls, I’ve hidden in the backyard, behind our playset. That's the one place my kids would never expect to find me! Hiding to finish my work only backfired once, when I came inside to find my two youngest kids making snow angels on the kitchen floor in breadcrumbs."
They Mute Their Phone to Yell at Their Kids
"I had an early morning conference call scheduled before my son went to preschool one morning. I locked the door to my office so he couldn't come in, but he started wailing and throwing a tantrum at the door. I put the phone on mute and ripped open the door and started yelling, 'Mommy is on the phone!' When everyone on the call got silent, I realized I hadn't turned on mute. It was horrifying to say the least! "
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