My husband is afraid of needles. Like, REALLY pass-out-on-the-floor afraid. I knew he'd be able to handle seeing me in labor, but I'm still sort of amazed that he made it through seeing me get an epidural without fainting.
Some other guys — not so lucky.
We found 11 dads who were willing, if we promised not to share their names, to tell us their embarrassing labor and delivery stories. We all know childbirth is tough work for a mom, but apparently it is a little more than some squeamish guys can handle!
Read on for all the gory details!
Image via Shutterstock.com/SFIO CRACHO
How Many?
"This was a long time ago (40 years, I guess) but my wife was having our third baby and it was the first time I was going to be in the room. The older ones were born when dads still waited in the lobby, which has its advantages!
"Anyways, I was there and she was in labor and nothing was happening and finally after hours, the doctors figured out that the problem was that she was having twins and one was stuck. We had no idea we had twins on the way. I remember hearing him say that word and then waking up on the floor. I think it was the combination of being tired and hungry and the shock of having two babies coming home.
"She ended up having a C-section and I waited in the lobby."
Slip and Slide
"I didn't even make it into the delivery room! My wife went into labor a few weeks early and I was on a sales call 75 miles away. I rushed to get there on time and when I got to the hospital, I was running down the hall and slipped on a wet spot. I knocked myself out on the floor. By the time they checked me for a concussion, I'd missed my son being born. I'm sure my wife will never, ever grow tired of telling this story."
Another Patient
"My wife was in labor with our third child and I started to feel really sick. I thought this was weird because I had been in the room for the other two kids with no problem. I was starting to feel a lot of pain and was shaking and sweating. I was trying not to let on but one of the nurses was like, 'you don't look so good, you need to sit down.'
"My wife was both worried about me and thinking I was being a baby about stuff, and then I started barfing uncontrollably. Yeah, turns out I had appendicitis! She had the baby and I had surgery to get my appendix out. It was crazy."
The Poke
"The epidural is where I lost it. I was holding her hands and I saw the needle go in and I just hit the floor. The doctor said it happens more than you'd think!"
More from CafeMom: 18 Worst Things Said to Moms During Labor & Delivery
Eat a Sandwich
"With our first kid my wife was in labor for a long time. A LONG TIME. She was determined to have a natural delivery and I wanted to be a good support. We'd been in the hospital for over 36 hours and I stayed by her side the whole time. I didn't even leave to eat, which was a problem.
"She was finally pushing and I was holding her leg and the room started spinning. I guess I passed out and the nurse used smelling salts to wake me up. The doctor took my pulse and diagnosed me as needing a sandwich."
Don't Look
"Pro-tip: If you are queasy with blood, DON'T LOOK over the curtain during a C-section. Thinking about it still makes me feel light-headed."
Water Works
"My wife was having a home and water birth. As she was in labor and pushing, the water started going from clear to, um, murky from fluids and stuff.
"The murky water grossed me out (I'm kind of a germaphobe) and I started feeling light-headed. I kind of stumbled forward and bounced off the side of the tub.
"The doula said she'd never seen anything like it. My wife was PISSED."
In It Together
"Fun fact: My wife and I BOTH threw up while she was in labor. It was a chain reaction thing. Puke makes me puke."
More from CafeMom: 6 of the Most Hilarious Delivery Stories You'll Ever Hear
Locked Legs
"I was holding my wife's leg, and had been for almost three hours, when I passed out! Apparently I was tense (ya think??) and had been locking my knees and forgetting to breathe.
"My wife still accuses me of trying to steal her thunder."
Bad News
"My wife was five days overdue and we were doing everything to get her to go into labor: sex, long walks, you name it. We decided to go for a spicy dinner to see if that would get things going. We went to our favorite Indian place and had a big spicy dinner. It must have worked because she went into labor a few hours later.
"We were at the hospital when I started getting the bad poops. My stomach was feeling terrible and I kept having to go to the bathroom. I was using the one in her room and she was starting to get grossed out by the smell. I thought I was done and then I came out and puked on the floor.
"Yep — food poisoning. I was so sick the whole night. Thankfully I was able to keep it together when it was time for her to push. As soon as she was done, I accidentally pooped my pants. Never trust a fart when you have food poisoning. We had to have my mom come with extra pants for me. Welcome to fatherhood!"
Aftermath
"I actually made it through labor just fine. A few hours later, though, the nurse came and did that thing where they press on my girlfriend's stomach and all of this blood came shooting out. It was all over the floors and my shoes. It looked like a crime scene and it made me so light-headed that I had to stagger over to the couch thing and put my head between my knees.
"She had a minor hemorrhage and I looked like an idiot. Thankfully we both survived."
