It should be exciting enough to learn that you're having a baby, but for some, the focus on whether it's a girl or a boy can become all-encompassing. At least, that's what happened to one couple at the center of a story going viral on Reddit this week. In the heartbreaking post, a mom-to-be claims her husband told her to terminate her pregnancy once he found out it was going to be a girl. And now, she says she's "lost on what to do."
The poster knew something was wrong the moment she saw her husband's face during the ultrasound.
As she explained in the post, it was clear her husband wasn't exactly thrilled at the thought of having a daughter, and after begging him to come to her ultrasound, she wrote that she had no idea he would react as strongly as he did to the news.
"He just went silent," she wrote. "And then he made me leave my appointment early."
(Yes — really.)
"I tried to object," the poster continued, "but he grabbed my arm really hard and told me that we’re going home."
Once they were alone in the car, the husband became "very agitated," which prompted the wife to ask him what was wrong.
"He told me he wants me to have an abortion," she then shared. "I asked him why and he told me he doesn’t want a girl so I’ll get an abortion and we’ll try again for a boy."
But even after she refused, her husband replied with a cryptic, “Yeah, okay we’ll see."
No matter what the woman did, her husband made it clear that she had to give him a son.
The mom-to-be told her husband that he couldn't force her to do it, but he told her that either she has this baby and tries for a boy right away, or she should take "the easy way and get an abortion right now."
Um, what?
"I just started to cry and he shushed me and kept squeezing my thigh painfully tight," the poster continued. "He’s been in a bad mood all night since but we haven’t talked anymore about it."
But now, the mom-to-be isn't sure what to do.
"I don’t know why he would put me in this position," she shared. "I can only hope that he calms down and lets it go, but I don’t think that will happen. My friends would never understand and I just can’t bring myself to talk to my father or my brothers about this."
That is why she's reaching out to the internet to get help.
Many people told the poster that this situation sounded dangerously close to abuse.
"I don’t know you or your situation but reading how he acted, was painful," one person wrote. "The way he grabbed you, his demeanor, are you safe with him? Is your baby safe with him? There’s so many red flags reading this that, whoah I hope you do what’s best for you and the baby but I’m so sorry you’re going through that."
"This doesn't sound crazy — it sounds like reproductive coercion," another added. "Coupled with your husband physically harming you by grabbing and squeezing you with the intent to hurt you, this is abuse."
The same commenter also clarified that reproductive coercion is "when one partner attempts to gain and maintain power and control over the victim's reproductive health and reproductive choices." And yes, the person wrote, "it is a form of domestic abuse."
Someone else advised that this was more than just a red flag.
"You should be packing your bags and leaving," the commenter wrote. "This is abusive behavior. This is not someone who’s just disappointed, this is someone who is dangerous. You and your baby do not need or deserve to live under this kind of stress."
At the day, the mom-to-be had to agree. Enough was enough.
In a later update, she wrote that she is from Brazil and would "have no money" without her husband, but she was determined to move on. "I will leave him," she wrote. "I really don’t want to but I know that I have to."
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, you can find help at the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
