There are bad gifts, and then there are terrible gifts. Bad gifts might be tacky or, at the very least, useless. But the fact is, they're harmless. Terrible gifts, however? They're the ones that leave you speechless. They're the ones that straight-up offend. According to one mom on Reddit, that's precisely the kind of gift her sister gave her 14-year-old daughter recently — and she was so shocked by what it was, she confronted her sister about it. The only catch? The internet isn't so sure the mom had a right to be so offended.
The woman recently took to Reddit to share the story of her sister's rude gift.
She prefaced it by saying that her family has always struggled a bit with the scale.
"We are all pretty healthy people, but we are not naturally thin," she wrote in her post. "Both of my parents are bigger, I'm a bit bigger, and growing up my sister was, too."
Her sister, however, works hard to manage her weight.
"She eats like a rabbit, and does pretty crazy workouts," the woman explained. "People tend to look up to her for keeping her weight down and 'getting healthy,' but from my perspective she is constantly stressing herself out to maintain this appearance with all of the running etc."
But now, her own daughter is 14, and the woman says she's been starting to feel self-conscious of her body -- just like most teen girls.
"She's a bit chubby like myself," the mother shared. "It makes me sad, but I'm trying to teach her to love herself for who she is."
Lately, though, she's been feeling like her words just aren't getting through, because her daughter's been increasingly turning to her aunt for advice. And with that, she's watched her daughter throw herself into new methods of losing weight.
"First was the at-home exercises and running," the mother shared. "It is difficult to watch her beat herself up with these exercises. She claims to enjoy them, but I'm sure she wouldn't do them if she didn't want to be skinny like my sister. Then she started regularly complaining about the food that I prepare. I’m not a huge vegetable person, and neither is anybody else in our family. I’m not going to waste money on it. It has led to many arguments between us."
But the "final straw" came recently.
A package arrived at her home one day that was addressed to her daughter. And when the mom opened it, she was stunned by what was inside.
It was a food scale.
When she spoke to her teen about it, the "gift" came as no surprise. In fact, she was expecting it.
"My daughter told me that since I will continue to make her eat unhealthy food, her aunt told her to weigh it out so she doesn't eat too much," the mother shared in her Reddit post.
Then, she confronted her sister about it.
"She is trying to push her lifestyle habits onto my daughter," the mother insisted. "I'm trying to teach her to love herself, not spend mental energy fighting biology. She tried to blame me for making my daughter 'unhealthy' in the first place."
On the one hand, the sister claims that she's merely trying to help. But the Reddit mom isn't buying it.
"Just because my daughter can't run a mile and do the difficult exercises she does to maintain her weight, doesn't mean she's not healthy," she wrote.
In the end, the two woman couldn't come to an understanding, and the phone call ended.
But then, she got a little feisty ...
"I hung up with my sister and went to post to Facebook about her buying my young daughter a scale and encouraging her to weigh her food," she said.
Ohhhh SNAP!
"People look up to her, and I think everyone should know that she pushes young women to hate their bodies," the woman continued, adding that her post received a lot of criticism.
A lot of the backlash came from people who thought she was way out of line for "trying to tarnish my sisters image and for refusing to let my daughter try to lose weight."
"From my perspective, I'm just trying to spread awareness about what she is doing," she said in her own defense. But now, she wants to know what others think of the whole thing.
In the comments, people had a lot of feelings -- and most of them were not exactly on board with the mom.
For starters, they wondered why the concept of simply preparing vegetables with dinner was out of the question and considered a "waste."
"PREPARE A VEGETABLE," one person told her. "You are a mother, act like a mother, don't use your daughter's body to push agenda that makes YOU feel better. Also I don't buy it for a second that you guys are 'naturally chunky' when you 'refuse to waste money on vegetables.'"
"This," another person added. "I cannot even imagine REFUSING to let a child eat vegetables."
People also wondered why the mom was so against her daughter trying to take up running.
"Running is not torture, and it's not just to lose weight," one person added. "I run because it gives me more energy and I like doing it. Millions of people do it as a hobby. Let her do healthy things."
"I can't believe [this mom] thinks her daughter not being able to run a mile is 100% normal," one person wrote. "It might not be possible for every kid, but a healthy 14-year-old should be able to run a mile or two!"
In fact, a lot of people wondered whether the mom's problem with the whole thing was actually tied to her own issues with weight.
"Why is the mom actively trying to make her daughter unhealthy to make herself feel better?" one person asked. "She relies on her mother for nutrition and her mother is failing her. I hope she realizes her mistakes before she pushes her daughter too far away."
"OP is in denial," another person agreed. "And having her own daughter change her diet and start exercising would force OP to reflect on her own lifestyle, which she clearly doesn't want to do."
Others went as far as to point a finger at larger cultural issues.
"I blame some people in the body positivity movement too," one person said. "The myth that you can be overweight and healthy let people like OP justify their lifestyle. If you're OK with being overweight, that's fine, but don't pretend it doesn't affect your health. It's exactly the same as a smoker claiming that smoking isn't unhealthy."
In the end, it was an all-around smackdown. No one really sided with the mom -- instead, they just schooled her on how short-sighted she was being.
"You don't get to weigh in," one person snapped. "Your daughter is trying to improve her heart health, her mobility, and her quality of life. She is certainly being more mature about her weight issues than you are. I remember 150 lbs. ago when I was 'not a vegetable person.' It's a flabby excuse for rolling over and giving up on yourself. You should be happy your daughter isn't following in your footsteps."
Ouch.
To date, the mom hasn't responded to any of the Reddit users' comments, which leads us to wonder … maybe she took their advice to heart?
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
