The world is strange right now, with the health crisis impacting everyone across the globe. We've had to limit so much of our daily normal, and while it has been a challenge in some regards, we all know it's essential. One of the harder aspects of it all has been needing to limit who we come into contact with and not seeing people we love as often as we would like. We've had to reduce our visits with family and friends and be very cautious over that "bubble" of people. It's even more of an issue for people who are more at risk of developing the severe effects of the virus.
Most people understand this and are aware of everyone needing to control their circumstances. But, not everyone gets it, and one mother-in-law seemingly took it to heart when she was denied a visit with her grandson.
An anonymous person posted to Reddit to try to get advice on a situation that happened with his MIL.
Posting on Reddit's Entitled Parents community and reposting to JUSTNOMIL, a dad, the OP, shared the story of his MIL and a recent interaction they had, which went sour.
"I have a doozy of a story that happened tonight. My wife and I are very distraught about it, and I would like to hear some outside opinions about what transpired and if We (wife and I) are at fault," OP explained.
"Last night, while I was giving my Son (17 months old) a bath, There was a knock at the door. I didn't hear it, as I was in the bathroom with a raging toddler. My wife came into the bathroom, and said that her parents were at the door, and she didn't know what to do," OP continued.
Turns out, the parents didn't call to let them know they were heading over. Generally, it's never been an issue if they pop over, but according to OP, they do ask for a phone call or text to give them a heads up that they were coming.
This time had the in-laws texted or called, OP said they would have told them not to come over.
Due to the worldwide health crisis, and the fact that this family just welcomed a little girl who was only 6 days old, their doctors suggested they isolate.
"She was born last week, and is 6 days old," OP explained. "Our doctor told us to self isolate for a few weeks up to a few months," he explained, depending on how the whole health situation went. "I informed my family of this, and they have been respectful of this. I do not know if My wife informed her parents of this until today."
When the in-laws arrived, he and his wife ignored the knock on the door -- pretended as if they weren't home.
"They left our house without getting greeted or spoken to, If my wife would have said anything, they would have tried to push the door in to get in," OP explained.
"There is no getting around that. They ignored her phone calls, and that was that, I thought. Then a hour after they left, Her mother calls, and My wife explained the situation, and what the doctor had told us to do, and the why behind it," he added.
This didn't go over well with MIL, who, according to OP, doesn't take the health situation seriously.
"Her mother did not take it very well and said don't worry about us (the parents) coming back over anymore," he said. Adding, "About a hour after that, Her dad sends a text message saying that we are no longer family, and that we have kept them away from our son."
OP then asked the community for advice, wondering if they were in the wrong for not allowing the grandparents to see the kids, or if it was OK for them to hold these boundaries.
The community on both Entitled Parents and JUSTNOMIL gave their opinions and advice.
"Sounds like they are 100% in the wrong," one commenter wrote. "If you don't want to totally lose the relationship I'd be tempted to message them along the lines of 'I'm sorry you feel that way, but I hope you respect our concerns for our children. Once it is safe again you are welcome to see our children, but until then I hope you understand that we are doing what we believe is the best, safest, thing.'" The commenter also noted, "No point in challenging or confrontational with them, no matter how crazy their ideas. Your not going to change that. Better to be calm, polite and assertive."
"I am pregnant and will do the same thing as you both," a second added. "You 100% did the right thing. Unfortunately there are a lot of people out there who are falling for conspiracy theories and it's causing rifts in families."
"My mom didn't get to see my son until he received his first vaccines at 2 months," shared another Reddit user. "Even then, my boyfriend sprayed her down with liquid hand sanitizer before she was allowed to get close to the baby. Only our parents have seen him, nobody else has been allowed to visit. Obviously we miss our friends and other family but my son's life is a little more important. If they can't understand that, they have no place in our lives."
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