As a parent, it's special to have someone call you "Mom" or "Dad." It's a title that many wear with pride. Others see it as a respect thing for their children refer to them by that title. Kids will sometimes use that to test limits and push boundaries, though, and try calling their parents by their first names instead. Some parents let it slide, but others do not.
One dad opened up on Reddit about his 15-year-old son's new decision to call him by his name instead of calling him "Dad." He's not having it at all, though, and people online are divided about how he's chosen to handle the situation.
The father said his son recently started calling him by his name instead of 'Dad.'
"When he first did it I asked him why and his answer was simply that it's my name and what everyone else calls me so he should too," the dad explained. Although he thought there might be a deeper reason behind it, it turns out that there wasn't at all. His son simply wanted to call him by his name.
The dad wasn't really happy with the change and told his son he deserves to be called "Dad" out of respect.
Despite his request, his son continued calling him by his name.
In retaliation, he has decided to completely ignore his son whenever he refers to him by his name, instead of calling him Dad. Things were going fine until dinner one evening.
"I was talking to my wife and he asked if I could pass some pasta to him and I just kept talking to my wife," the man shared. He continued the entire dinner, calling him by his name, so the father ignored his son the entire time.
The Reddit user's wife felt he was being 'childish.'
His wife said that he should just indulge their son and expressed that she thinks his decision is just a phase. He's also started calling her by her first name as well.
The father, however, did not budge and said he doesn't want to be called by his name and deserves to be respected by their son.
Many people online sided with the dad for standing his ground.
Some people said that parenting is about teaching kids about life, including the importance of boundaries.
"A key part of parenting is teaching your kids boundaries. What you want to be called and how you want to be addressed is one of them," commented one person. "His mother is okay with it so he can call her by name. His father, isnât. So yeah thereâs a lesson in there for the kid."
Another person agreed, writing, "Youâve stated your preference for how youâd like to be called. People do this all the time in and out of the home, and others respect those wishes, whether itâs nicknames, pronouns, etc. Ignoring your request to be called âdadâ is disrespectful, just as it would not be respectful for you to call him by a name he didnât want to be called by."
Other people believed that the dad was making too big of a deal out of it, though.
Some people online said that they know people who don't refer to their parents by the traditional titles and instead use their first names, so they don't see whey this situation is such a big deal.
"I have two cousins that get along great with their parents, but they are quite mature and independent for young teenagers and they refer to their parents by their names. The parents are fine with it," shared one Reddit user.
"My brother went through that phase of calling my parents by their first names. It lasted a couple of years," another person shared. "I feel like a lot of children do that during adolescence as part of separating their identity from their parents' [identity]."
Overall, many commenters thought the dad should just be upfront about his feelings rather than ignore his son.
Even though many Reddit users agreed with the dad, some said he needs to be clear about what lesson he wants to teach his son and why. Some Reddit users suggested that he tell his son that calling him anything but Dad hurts him and that he enjoys being called by that title.
One person suggested the father say this: "I'm really hurt. I've raised you from a tiny baby and every single decision I've made for 15 years is with you in mind. The name dad is a recognition of that role. I'm Alan to the traffic warden. When you refuse to call me Dad it sounds like you don't even recognise our relationship, or appreciate the role I've played your whole life."
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