When I was pregnant with my firstborn, I was ecstatic when I found out that we were going to have a girl. I don’t have anything against boys. Boys are awesome, which I learned when we had our second. But with the first one, I was really looking forward to having a girl who I could dress in fun clothes, identify with when she got older, and who looked like me. I seem to have gotten all of these things, but I didn’t realize at the time just how much she would be like me in terms of not only looks but personality.
I know my personality is not always a walk in the park. I have mood swings like no other. I get in funks depending on how much food I’ve had that day. The hangry is a real problem for me that I need to stay on top of, and now I need to closely monitor it in my kids. Eating every two hours is key to keeping everyone from losing their minds. My kids also have a distinct pattern of fighting right before mealtime. Now that I’m paying attention, it all makes sense and is predictable.
My daughter’s mood swings honestly rival my own.
I tend to growl when I’m angry and most of all hangry. It is super irritating when I’m the one getting growled at and when the hangry is directed at me. I have inadvertently taught her some of my more irritating quirks, and I’m truly sorry for that. Because now my husband has to deal with both of us. Plus, my son has picked up on these things as well. So not only do I have one mini-me, but I technically have two.
It can be exhausting having all of your worst qualities reflected back at you.
I never even realized that this would happen. I should have known when she first crinkled up her nose as an infant that she would be imitating me for her entire life. It makes complete sense now, and it would have been hard to avoid.
It has taught me some valuable lessons, though.
I now view it as a push toward self-improvement. I correct the growling in them and myself. I’m working hard to keep myself from doing it. The exacerbated sounds are really not necessary, and I didn’t realize how annoying it was to others until my kids started doing it to me.
She’s picked up good things too, but it can be hard to find them through all of the irritating ones sometimes.
My love for reading and writing is reflected in her. She pretends to write her own stories. She tells me that she wants to be a writer someday. Other days, she is all her own and tells me that she wants to be a carpenter or an artist.
For as mood-swingy that she can be, she also loves hard.
She often realizes what I need before I do. When I don’t think I want to be touched, she’s there with a hug. She has a depth of understanding that I don’t always have. Although she’s picked up some stuff from me, she is her own unique mix. And even though I get exhausted, I wouldn’t change a thing about her.
