Being an aunt or uncle is one of the coolest jobs you can have. You don’t have to be a full-time parent, but you get to have a relationship with children. Of course, you have a certain responsibility to keep them safe, but you also get to be the fun adult in their lives. It’s a really special relationship if you’re lucky to have one.
A man turned to Reddit to ask if he was a bad uncle after a conversation with his sister. The man had a coffee drink in front of his nephew, prompting a scolding from his sister for setting a bad example for the little boy.
More from CafeMom: I Donated Sperm to My Sister & Her Wife so My Biological Son Is Also My Nephew
He takes his role as uncle very seriously.
The uncle asked the always honest AITA community to weigh in on his dilemma. He explained that his older sister has a 5-year-old son who “likes to copy me.” The little boy’s father is no longer in the picture, so the man is the “closest older male relative” he has.
According to the man, his sister “insists” that he sets a good example for his nephew, and he says he “doesn’t have any issues” doing so. “I don’t smoke and I only drink very occasionally,” like at weddings or other special occasions.
He figured his lifestyle was a good example.
He explained that he tends to prefer “healthier food options like fish and vegetables,” and that when his nephew is around, he has to “refrain from eating potato chips.”
“Yesterday we were at a cafe together and I ordered a large hazelnut latte,” he said. The drink is something he typically orders at the cafe, but it was the “first time going there with my sister and nephew.”
The uncle had no idea that his sister would get upset.
“My sister frowned and told me I shouldn’t drink such sweet stuff,” he said, speculating that based on the taste, it probably had sweetener in it. “She was quite upset at me for drinking something like that in front of my nephew, saying she doesn’t want him to want such drinks because he sees me drinking it.”
Even though he didn’t say anything else, it’s clear he was worried about his sister’s reaction.
Her reaction hardly seems fair to her brother.
“I guess she should parent her kid then?” one person wrote. “Growing up I saw lots of stuff I wanted: soda, candy, etc; however none of those were things my parents kept in the house, I could have them on special occasions but it wasn’t an everyday thing. I accepted this as part of being a kid, because that was the expectation that my parents set for me and it sounds like your sister needs to do the same.”
More from CafeMom: My Sister Told Me Not To Bring My Boyfriend to Family Events So I’m Refusing To Babysit Her Kid
Another person wrote: “Setting a good example doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to drink coffee in front of a 5 year old. If your sister doesn’t want him to see that, then she shouldn’t have taken him to a cafe.”
People claimed the problem was the sister’s, not his.
“Maybe suggest she says something like ‘uncle John can have a big coffee because he’s a grownup, but if you’re good we can get you a (kid size) hot chocolate next time,'” one commenter suggested. “Its one sugary drink, not like u drink them every single day. If shes that worried maybe she should just explain to him that its a grown up treat and not for kids. Its her kid, her responsibility to teach him about healthy choices.”
Another person put the blame squarely on the sister. “It is not your responsibility to set an example for your nephew,” the person wrote. “If you want to do so, that’s nice, but not required. Having a hazelnut latte is not setting a bad example, it’s enjoying your drink at a café. Your sister is, frankly, taking the p—.”
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
