When you have a baby, you always hope that your family will be happy for you. With many pregnancies, there's a sense of excitement, but sometimes, this situation can be challenging if someone close to you is experiencing infertility.
Although they want to share in your joy, there may be an underlying sense of sadness or even jealousy. That appears to be the case for one woman who recently posted on Reddit's AITA forum.
OP has three children, and she explained that her older sister, Jodie, doesn't have any kids and has had difficulty getting pregnant. During a major blowout, OP told Jodie that she hopes she never has a baby. Harsh words, but OP believes they were justified. Their parents disagree, though, and now she's wondering whether she went too far.
Jodie has been trying to have a baby for years.
OP explained that she is 22 and her sister is 34. OP has 3-year-old twins and a brand-new baby. Jodie has been struggling with infertility for 10 years. In addition, she has experienced several miscarriages. Clearly, this is emotionally difficult for Jodie, and it has caused some feelings for OP.
"I used to feel really bad for her and also a bit guilty as I got pregnant twice while being on contraception. It caused some tension between us when I was pregnant with my twins because she was jealous, and I was already feeling intense guilt. This time around, she wasn't as jealous but I still felt it was unfair," OP explained.
OP offered to be a surrogate for Jodie.
OP and her husband came to the mutual decision that they were finished having kids. In an extremely thoughtful and loving move, OP offered to be a surrogate for Jodie as soon as she was cleared from her doctor after the birth of her newest child.
Jodie was ecstatic and even offered to take care of OP's twins when she went to the hospital to give birth to baby No. 3. OP was relieved to have the help. When OP went into labor, Jodie came over to take care of the kids, and everything seemed fine.
She was wrong.
When OP got home, she was shocked by what she saw.
Apparently, Jodie went totally nuts while OP and her husband were at the hospital and destroyed their home. She ruined thousands of dollars worth of baby items, including tearing apart the baby's mattress. Then she wanted to blame it on the twins!
"Jodie tried to pin it on the twins but they're 3, and this level of destruction had to have been done by an adult," OP wrote. "My twins can't even reach some of the stuff that was destroyed, and they certainly do not know how to open diaper packages and tear them apart. I know kids, especially toddlers, can do a lot of damage in a short time but I also know my children aren't capable of doing what happened."
A huge argument ensued.
Devastated by the destruction, OP lost it and started screaming at Jodie. She said a lot of things that, admittedly, she regrets, but not everything. She went for the jugular and hit Jodie where it hurt.
"I told my sister to get the [expletive] out of my home, and stay away from me and my family," she wrote. "I got really angry, and I said a lot of stuff I shouldn't have, but one of them was, 'I hope you never have a child, and if you do then I'll tell it exactly what you've done to mine.'"
Yikes!
Jodie went right to her parents and basically told on OP.
Jodie continues to deny any involvement in ruining OP's baby things. Conveniently, OP's parents found out about what happened and thought she was the a–hole.
Her parents stand behind Jodie and think calling out her fertility struggles was a low blow. OP disagreed, so she turned to Reddit to get more opinions on the situation.
Readers were quick to call out Jodie.
People weren't buying that the twins destroyed everything, and they were afraid for their safety under Jodie's watch, ultimately saying how terrifying it must have been for them.
"It's horrible that she tried to pin it on the twins after putting them through that, like I don't even want to imagine how terrified they must have been. I've worked with children for most of my adult life, especially children the age range the twins are in (like 1-5 years old generally). There is no way they caused the levels of damage that OP described, like ripping open a mattress even if it was small," one person wrote.
"The other thing too is that unless OP's sister literally left them unattended, like not even in the home with them, they wouldn't have had the opportunity to cause that much damage," the person continued. "I don't think I know anyone who would miss kids causing damage that major while it was happening near them, even if it was a different room."
Another person commented that it was pretty telling that only baby items were destroyed. "The fact that it was only the baby stuff that was destroyed also lends credence to the fact that her sister destroyed everything. Kids do get into things, I have have four girls, but not like that."
People couldn't believe that OP's parents were siding with Jodie.
One person pointed out that the parents are pretty delusional. "This I just don't get how your parents are okay with the fact she completely destroyed the new baby's things and probably scared and possibly hurt the twins. How are they not grasping what actually happened?!"
Another commenter suggested that the parents didn't understand what happened. "Your sister is deeply disturbed. Your parents probably don't understand the breadth of what happened. Take pictures. I'd say this merits some kind of legal action, but I wouldn't know where to start."
Readers determined she is not the in the wrong, but she better get a police report.
As one person suggested, "OP, you need to file a police report for destruction of property and maybe even contact CPS. Your sister is unwell and should not be allowed to provide care to children."
Another commenter echoed the sentiment that she needs to look out for her twins.
"Call the Police. She has committed a criminal offense. Work with your insurer and also see if Police can refer you to a social worker to process the trauma your twins must have gone through while she was destroying your home."
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