Having a one-night stand, or a single night of casual sex often with a stranger/acquaintance, is a normal occurrence for many people. Depending on comfort level, some people have frequent one night-stands, some people treat them as a “bucket list item,” and others avoid them altogether. A woman took to Reddit to ask men, “how do you feel after a one night stand?” She went on to explain why she was asking the question.
“As a girl, I have had 2 one night stands in my life. And after both I kinda felt a feeling of shame and disgust. Despite being what I wanted in the moment. How do men usually feel?” she asked. Here’s how men responded to her question:
People who love no-strings-attached sex:
“Just fine. Nothing shameful or disgusting about sex between two consenting adults.” –DreadfulRauw
“Nothing wrong with having fun and moving on.” –Emotional_Piano_9259
“FUCKING AMAZING. It’s worth noting I have only had two and had otherwise only had sex in long term relationships. Both times though it was like the beast inside had the door to it’s cage opened and was allowed to have a few hours of unrestrained fun with no concern for the consequences. We were just two people treating each other like a piece of meat. And in the second case, she paid for my cab back to my hotel. Feeling desired like that left me smiling like a lunatic for a week because I was so internally satisfied. For me it was not a walk of shame, and was but more of a stride of pride.” –ColdHardPocketChange
“Great, I clapped some cheeks. Mission accomplished.” –Prestigious_Snow1589
People who have mixed feelings:
“I’d had a mix of feelings. I’ve definitely felt regret and disgust with myself afterwards. Other times I’ve felt great. It’s about 50/50 I’d say.” –ruewit_
“I brought a girl over for what she thought was a one night stand. We clicked so well she moved in a month later and we are happily married five years later. I think I’m bad at one night stands lol.” –interSphere1
“When I was younger and sex itself was still a fun new novelty I didn’t think about it. Once that wore off though I found it wasn’t for me. Left me feeling hollow and wishing it was more than that.” –JuniorDoughnut3056
“I enjoyed it in the moment then felt sad afterwards because part of me wanted more than just a ONS.” –Thatroyalkitty
“Fine and accomplished. I can’t speak for other men and tell you how we ‘usually’ feel, but that’s how I feel.” –Hefty-Confusion6810
“I only had one in college and while it was kind of a cool bucket list thing to cross off, it was ultimately pointless.” –InterestPractical974
“Only ever had one, and I found it kind of… unfulfilling. I felt like I could’ve just jerked off. It would have been just as satisfying, and a lot less messy. Mostly, I learned that I’m not a one-night stand kind of guy, and that’s okay.” –full_of_ghosts
“Between 18 and 23 I hated it. I felt pretty rubbish afterwards, I didn’t know how to communicate and didn’t really understand myself. Now I’m 36 and I’ve no problem with it. I am sure to communicate and make sure my partner has a good time. I’d say there is less drink involved and such, it just feels natural now.” –Urafado
People who hate one-night stands:
“Awful. Damn near suicidal. Like a bad person mixed with an idiot mixed with a failure. Not even necessarily cause of the sex but because it was almost an admission that I took what I could get rather than what I actually needed.” –Restoriust
“I’ve come to learn that it’s not my cuppatea!” –agreatcuppatea
“Empty. Sexually as well as emotionally.” –0JAK03
“I don’t knock it, but I don’t like it either. I feel gross personally. I’m not a god fearing man. I just think its a special time for a special person, not a random woman, But I can’t say I have always been above it. Booze was involved every time a ‘hit it and quit it’ happened.” –defnotthebatman
“Like crap. I dunno, there is something cruddy about realizing ‘Oh I guess they didn’t like me and/or I didn’t make the cut then.’ I guess it might be different if they were upfront about it? I don’t know.” –usernamescifi
