We’re all for trying new things in the bedroom. But sometime those "exciting" sex positions we read about? Yeah … they’re not so sexy in real life. You know it's too complicated when you feel like you’re both about to fall over on your faces. And the ones that twist you up into a pretzel and pull a muscle? Ouch! Is this yoga class or sex?!?
No one knows this better than Cosmo – the magazine that’s been churning out zany sex tips stories for decades. So who better to make fun of Karma Sutra disasters? The magazine got a couple to try out Cosmo sex positions IN PUBLIC. And they took video of the whole thing!
Don’t worry, it’s actually safe for work. And you're definitely going to want to see the spectacle.
Our fearless lovers don flesh-toned body stockings and plunk their blanket and pillow next to a busy city fountain (romantic!). Meanwhile, shocked onlookers can only gasp and point as the two weirdos commence to acting out the positions, mostly unsuccessfully.
First up was the "Erotic Accordian" — and if the name is any indication you know it's going to be all about AWKWARD. He lies on his back with his knees up, she squats over him, legs become entwined, and … it kind of looks like how bugs have sex.
The position "Yes, Yes, Yes" sounds more promising. She lies on her belly while he lies on top of her and somehow worms his way in. (Yeah, sorry about that.) Needless to say this is WAY too counter-intuitive to work.
More from The Stir: 12 Sex Positions That Really Hit 'The Spot'
"Rock a Bye Booty" at least has the couple facing each other in a sitting position. They each open their legs around each other, knees bent, and surprise! That one actually looks do-able and fun. So does "Wanton Wheelbarrow" — despite the goofy name.
They move on to "Head over Heels," which has him holding her upside-down. They can't even get into the position! It's physically impossible for them. Just NO. Actually, it may be my favorite only because it's the funniest. Have a look!
Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tziMoPCWTaY
Aren't you worn out just by watching these two? Well, after you recover you should check back in again because this is just the first in a series. Cosmo has at least two more "Sex Positions" videos, maybe more to come. We can only hope! They're like anti-porn, in a way, aren't they?
We love that Cosmo can laugh at itself like this. And we love how the videos help us laugh at sex in general, too!
Have you ever tried a crazy sex position that didn't work out for you at all?
Image via © iStock.com/101dalmatians, Cosmopolitan.com/YouTube
