Most of us love the idea of having a smokin' sex life. But there are days (weeks? months? years?) when that wish and reality just don't sync up. WHERE is the "on" switch for your libido? If only it were that easy! Science to the rescue!
We're tapping the spankin' new book, The Real Science of Sex Appeal from HowStuffWorks.com for tips on getting into a frisky state of mind.
Have you tried any of these? Are there other tricks that help get you in the mood?
Image via kichigin/Shutterstock, Volt Collection /shutterstock
Full-On Flirting
Before you even get into the bedroom, set the tone by flirting. This could involve complimenting your partner, touching him a lot, angling your hips playfully toward him, leaning in close to him while talking, and smiling a lot. The key: Use all or most of these at once to remove all doubt of your intentions.
Use Your Sexy Voice
It's been proven multiple times that straight women are more turned on by deeper male voices. So, guys, hang out in your lower vocal range — just not so low you sound ridiculous. And ladies, tune in to those lower registers.
Mirror Each Other
Yeah, we know — mimes are so NOT sexy. But hear us out! "When people interact in dating scenarios, and things are going well, mirroring of body language often happens subconsciously," say the authors of The Real Science of Sex Appeal.
And men respond more favorably to women who slightly mimic their verbal and nonverbal patterns. So make like a mime, and try to subtly reflect your man's body language. Watching him so closely may put you in the mood, too.
Just Kiss
Not feeling it yet? Give each other a long, lingering kiss. Kissing — yes, just plain old kissing — releases a cocktail of powerful hormones that give you feelings of affection and pleasure and raise your heart rate. It can even transfer testosterone (a hormone linked with higher sex drive!) if one of you is already aroused. Score!
Eat Your Way to Lust
The experts behind The Real Science of Sex Appeal point out that foods claiming to be aphrodisiacs aren't yet research-proven. On the other hand, just thinking something is an aphrodisiac can actually work. You know, the placebo effect.
If you're curious, you can try foods that have been used historically and anecdotally as aphrodisiacs like aniseed, avocado, bananas, sweet basil, cardamom, chocolate, chili peppers, cucumbers, fennel, figs, garlic, ginger, ginseng, honey, licorice, nutmeg, oysters and pine nuts.
Order Pizza or Light a Candle
Smells can turn you on, too! But not necessarily the ones you'd think. The scent of pizza sends five percent more blood flow to the penis. But the scents of pumpkin pie and lavender increase blood flow by 40 percent — and those scents are a turn-on for women, as well. Come to think of it, did you find yourself feeling frisky right after Thanksgiving dessert?
Do That Thing You Don't Want to Do
You know, WORK OUT? It works! Vigorous exercise sends blood flowing to all the right places and sets off those "happy" chemicals. Exercise and building up your muscles can also raise your testosterone levels, which in turn revs up your sex drive — even for women.
More from The Stir: 11 Strangely Sexy Turn-Ons Women Confess About Their Husbands
Pin It
As sexy lifestyle expert Dana B. Myers reminded us recently, a great way to get yourself in the mood is to fantasize about sex. Visuals will help get you there, so curate your own secret Pinterest sex board no one else can see … but you. And your man, if you're so inclined to show him.
Text Some Temptation
Text your guy the naughtiest photo of yourself you've ever sent. Maybe a snapshot of something only he gets to see, a part of you you'd like him to touch. And then dare him to send you back a photo of himself.
