The truth is, when most single folks build their online dating profiles, there's always the inclination to put up appearances. They make sure to include in their profiles their list of super interesting hobbies, or upload their most adventurous photos — and they tend to skip out on the "truer" details. After all, people don't like to advertise their penchants for trashy reality TV and pizza-only diets right out of the gate.
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But for single moms who are trying to find love on dating apps, the stakes are totally different. They aren't stressing about looking like a fitspo star — they are more worried about chasing away potential partners with hard-core truth bombs like needing someone who is "dad material."
We asked 15 moms who are looking for love to reveal the super real facts about themselves they're most afraid to share on their dating profiles — and the few that they have no shame in sharing at all! No shame, ladies, we all need to do what works best for us.
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From no-dick-pic policies to how the kids will always come first, here's what a single mom's dating profile would look like if she were being brutally honest. And FYI, single guys, a woman with children can be tons of fun!
Number One
"I don't put this in my profile, but I probably should: No matter how cute you are, you're always going to be second fiddle to my daughter. She's my permanent number one!" — Ashley R., Lawrence, Kansas
Tuesday Special
"I have one dating rule that I don't put in my profile because I don't want to seem crazy, but it would actually be helpful for dudes to know. I can only have sex on Tuesday nights. That's the night my son is with his dad, so I don't have to pay a babysitter. That means dates can go past dinner and drinks and I can get some action! But only on Tuesdays, at least for now." — Tammie S., Los Angeles, California
Don't Waste My Time
"I don't say it, but I totally think it: I have to pay a babysitter $9 an hour, so please don't waste my time asking me on a lame date. A crappy dinner isn't worth hiring a sitter for." — Pamela E., Des Moines, Iowa
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First Dibs
"If I were being honest, I'd say 'I'm still breastfeeding, so my boobs are not usually this big; also, I don't want anyone touching them and my daughter has first dibs on them.'
"I don't see that going over well though." — Jennifer D., Saint Paul, Minnesota
No Drama Mama
"I put 'I'm a mama with no time for drama' on my profile because it's so true. I'm a single mom and a business owner and I'm not trying to let people in my life who make me stressed out." — Raven D., Tampa, Florida
Some Ground Rules
"I should say 'If you are lucky enough to get to see me naked, you'd better not flinch when you see my stretch marks or C-section scar!'" — Laurie R., Santa Clara, California
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Just Don't
"After learning the hard way, I finally put a line in my profile that says (and I'm not kidding here): 'Please don't send me any photos of yourself that you wouldn't send your mom. I share my phone with my kids.'
"I get A LOT less responses than I used to. But I also get A LOT less dick pics, so I count that as a win." — Joannie F., San Antonio, Texas
TMI?
"Do you think I'd still get swipes if I said 'I've had four children in nine years. Things are a little looser than they used to be. Please don't try to get with me if you have a small penis'? Probably not." — Sasha V., Las Vegas, Nevada
Dad Material
"I've got the double whammy, I think. I've got a kid and I'm over 40. If I were being totally honest, I'd say 'I still want the dream. I still want to get married. Don't call me if you aren't dad material.'
"I think that would scare guys off though." — Grace R., Holland, Michigan
More Please
"For some reason, a lot of guys assume that since I have two kids, I don't want any more [children]. Not true! I want to say — but I don't — that I'm not done yet. I want more kids and I want a man who wants that too." — Amie T., Columbia Heights, Minnesota
He's Still Here
"My ex-husband and I still share a house. Yes, I know. But it works for us right now and it's great for my kiddo. I do mention it in my profile because I've learned that it is a deal breaker for a lot of guys. I'm tired of wasting my time with guys who aren't able to deal with the fact that my ex is still here." — Jordyn B., Tulsa, Oklahoma
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No Overnights
"After years of sharing my bed with an ex who snored like a freight train, I'm so loving having my own bed and my own space. So I'm in a no-sleepovers-space right now. I should put that in my profile but I don't." — Hailey J., Fort Collins, Colorado
Too Honest
"With the kids and my job, I don't really feel like I've got the bandwidth for a relationship right now. But I'd still like to get laid sometimes!
"When I was first on Tinder, I made it pretty clear that I was looking for no-strings-attached sex. It was honest, but I got flooded with SO many creepy guys. So now I pretend that I'm looking for a relationship so the guys who respond are a little higher quality. I'm still just there because I'm looking for sex though." — Name withheld by request
Fun Date
"I'm a 'put it all out there' kind of girl. So I have this in my profile: 'I probably got peed on by a 3-year-old today, so please take me out for a fun date.'
"I need some nice, non-sippy-cup times in my life." — Patrice P., Buffalo, New York
Good Luck
"Here is the truth I don't put in my profile: Winning me over will be easy; winning over my 4-year-old? Good freaking luck.'
"She's a tough nut to crack but a very good judge of character, I think." — Janice V., Mendota Heights, Minnesota
