People don’t always know what to do when a couple welcomes a new baby into their lives. Should they offer to babysit? Bring a few meals over? Do they give the new parents space to develop a routine and figure out their new lives? Or should they move in and become the village that the child will inevitably need throughout the course of their lives?
The best friends and family follow the wishes of the mother. And others, such as the mother-in-law we recently read about on Reddit, overstep. When one husband noticed how his MIL’s presence was upsetting his wife, he took matters into his own hands. Now he’s wondering if he went too far.
The OP’s MIL dropped in unannounced.
This husband and new father went to Reddit to ask if he was unfair to his wife’s mom. He began by sharing that his wife just gave birth to a new baby – after previously losing a child – a week and a half ago. It was a high-risk pregnancy, so the couple is trying to take it easy.
“We both agreed that we didn’t want a ton of visitors or anything like that in the beginning but my wife’s mother showed up a few days after bringing baby home,” he shared in his post. The OP made a point to mention that his wife and MIL are not close to one another.
The MIL started making snide comments.
The couple reluctantly let the newly minted grandmother stay in their home. She said she would be a big help and they believed her, but it wasn’t long before things went south.
“I noticed her criticizing my wife breastfeeding, asking when we’ll eat a ‘real meal’ instead of takeout (I also cook when I can but I not only am working at home but taking care of my baby as well my wife), kissing baby against my wife and I’s wishes, the list goes on,” he explained. The OP could tell his wife was upset but she didn’t want to rock the boat.
He might have let this dynamic continue except he was talking to his wife one night and she suddenly burst into tears. The OP said he was p—ed. “A little after midnight when everyone was asleep I packed my mother in law’s sh–t and woke her up and told her that I can arrange a hotel and a ride there for her but she can’t stay here as this is too much stress for my wife,” he shared.
He added that he couldn’t stand idly by anymore. His MIL left on her own, refusing his cab offer.
Surprisingly, his wife was appreciative.
In the morning, he told his wife what he’d done. Thankfully, she was appreciative of what he did and even said she was relieved. But some of their other family members don’t see it this way.
“My wife’s side of the family are divided though and the ones who aren’t happy with me have been sure to let me know,” he wrote. The OP wants to know if he should repair things or let it be.
The community agreed he was in the right.
Most of the Reddit community agreed that he did the right thing. “She should have been asking what she could make for dinner,” one commenter shared. “What she could do to make life easier for the two of you. She was an obstacle to your wife’s recovery. You don’t owe her any apology.”
Another Redditor called for a standing ovation for this husband. Others shared that they wished their husbands had behaved similarly. “If my ex had been like you we might still be married. True story,” someone wrote.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
