There is something precious about the bond between a mother and son. But as the boy transitions into manhood, one or both parties may find that they have trouble letting go. When it’s the son, we might call him a “mama’s boy,” but sometimes it’s the mother who has a hard time cutting the cord.
While there might not be a name for her, a mom who has trouble letting go of her adult son is also problematic. For one couple who recently welcomed a newborn into their family, the interference was unbearable.
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A woman explained how her MIL had become a nuisance.
A new mom and wife wrote into Reddit’s AITA forum to get some perspective about a tense exchange she had with her mother-in-law. The original poster just had a baby four days ago, and shared how her MIL had been bombarding her and her husband with phone calls. The MIL is sick and wants her son, the OP’s husband, to take care of her. But as new parents, the OP explained that her husband took off two weeks to be home to take care of his wife and bond with their child.
Because the OP had complications during a C-section and lost a lot of blood, she needs even more assistance than a lot of new mothers. But her “MIL took that as him being free and available and refuses to acknowledge that he’s not on vacation.”
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The MIL called over 70 times in one night.
Instead, the MIL has been calling incessantly. The calls began three minutes after the OP gave birth. She wasn’t calling to inquire about her grandchild either. She wanted her son to go to her because she wasn’t feeling well. The pleas didn’t stop there.
“She kept calling every hour when I was still in the hospital,” the OP wrote. “My husband stayed with me the entire time… He put his phone on DND and didn’t turn it on until i was discharged. We were still in the hospital parking lot when she called, he answered and when he explained the situation she lost her absolute mind and he ended the call. She hasn’t stopped calling him and he blocked her number last night at 4am after 73 calls from her.”
The OP told her MIL she married a deadbeat.
When the MIL could no longer reach her son, she started calling the OP. “I tried to be polite but after 15 calls between 7am and 3pm where she called me names, yelled at me and insulted me I snapped and told her to leave us alone because we have a newborn at home.”
That’s when the MIL said she couldn’t understand why her son couldn’t visit because her husband never took care of her after she gave birth and didn’t actively parent the children until they were 3 and 4. Fed up, the OP responded.
“I told her it’s not my fault she married and had kids with a deadbeat and to leave us alone and figure her own s— out like an adult,” she explained. The OP said she felt like an a— for saying what she did in that manner.
Reddit users agreed she was NTA.
But the people of Reddit disagreed.
“Your mother in law has some serious mental health issues,” one user concluded. “She needs to learn that she is not the center of the universe…I would set limits with her and go low contact until she can begin to act like an adult! NTAH.”
Someone even assured the OP that her calling the MIL’s husband a “deadbeat” wasn’t out of order. “You’re just pointing out the obvious,” the person stated.
Another user pointed out the MIL’s blatant manipulation. “It’s just a power play,” they wrote. “She’s jealous that her baby doesn’t see her as number 1 and is desperately trying to make him pick her over his wife. The timing of everything proves it’s just a control tactic.”
The OP and her husband have since gone no-contact.
Thankfully, the OP took the advice of the Redditors to heart. She edited her original post to say that she and her husband had blocked his mother on all channels. “My husband sent her a long and detailed email informing her of our decision to go no contact and the reasons behind it. She was also told that if she continues to try to contact us in any way we will be going to the police for harassment and look into getting a restraining order against her. She responded that it wasn’t fair and said “is that bitch making you do this?” the OP shared. “So yeah. She’s banned from our lives indefinitely.”
She also shared that despite the complicated birth and family drama, she and her baby are doing well.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
