24-Year-Old Celebrates Her Sterilization With a Viral Photo Shoot

@Abbysworldsastage/TikTok

Some women have a hard time convincing friends and loved ones that they don’t want kids. When they say it as children, people claim they’re young and don’t know what they’re talking about. If they proclaim it again in their early 20s, people say they simply haven’t met the right person yet. If they echo the sentiment once they’re in a committed relationship, people may resort to scare tactics. They’ll claim that these women will one day regret their choices. But one woman wanted to let the world know that she was resolute in her decision and that her voluntary sterilization was a cause for celebration.

'I finally found a doctor who listened,' Abby wrote of her sterilization procedure.

@abbysworldsastage I’m excited to take control of my own body. I’m not a baby maker. #childfree #childfreebychoice #sterilization #celebration ♬ abcdefu (angrier) - GAYLE

Twenty-four-year-old Abby Ramsay went viral on TikTok when she posted a photo shoot. Over the images, she wrote: “After about six years of trying …”

Then we see Abby opening a box that reads, “Congratulations, it’s a …” Abby opened the box and the word “sterilization” appears on the screen. She writes, “I finally found a doctor who listened. This one goes out to all the ones who didn’t.”

In the caption, Abby wrote, “I’m excited to take control of my own body. I’m not a baby maker.”

Abby has known this was the right decision for her for some time.

Later, on Instagram, Abby shared more of the journey she went on to get to this place. “If you know me, you know that I decided to live the child-free life since I was at least 16,” she wrote.

“When I turned 19 I decided to start looking into permanent sterilization. The first OBGYN I brought this up to told me I needed therapy (I was already getting therapy at the time) and told me she would not discuss it with me," she continued. "Another basically just blamed all my problems on hormones and sent me away with birth control pills, even though I told her multiple times that they made me violently ill. Another said that no one should ever get a surgery they don’t absolutely need (even after I brought up plastic surgery and my family history of ovarian cancer which the surgery would also help prevent).”

Doctors told her the surgery was too permanent but advised her to have a baby.

Abby left these doctors’ offices feeling anywhere from frustrated to traumatized. “I was infantilized and not listened to and not taken seriously. I was told I was too young to make such a permanent decision and then told I should have a baby in the same breath as if that was somehow less permanent,” she continued in her post.

Eventually, she did find a doctor who heard her. The physician even discovered the source of the pain Abby had been in for years. Before the surgery, Abby said she was feeling a mix of relief, excitement, and nerves.

“I know my body, and I know what is right for me, and I want to thank my doctors for recognizing that and working with my needs. We need more doctors like that," she said.

Abby eventually had a combination surgery to prevent pregnancy and to help ease her endometriosis symptoms.

Abby underwent a combination surgery: a  bilateral salpingectomy, removing both of her fallopian tubes, and endometrial ablation, a surgery that removes a layer of tissue (the endometrium) from the uterus, BuzzFeed reported.

The two surgeries eliminate her chances of getting pregnant and provide relief from her endometriosis. The other doctors didn’t see fit to prioritize Abby’s wishes or even her comfort each month during her period.

“My pain and my desires and my goals and my life were all dismissed because of a baby that didn’t even exist,” Abby told the news outlet. “A hypothetical person had more control over my future than I did.”

The playful TikTok eventually became a way for women to share resources with one another.

@abbysworldsastage Reply to @gweb318 let’s help each other and share resources. #mybodymychoice #supremecourt #sterilization #childfree #roevwade #abortionrights #childfreebychoice #bisalp #sterilizationresources ♬ original sound - Abbysworldsastage

On TikTok, her announcement quickly became a resource for women who want to remain child-free. Other women sent the names of doctors around the country who offer the type of care Abby received. She pinned the post to help other women avoid some of the pitfalls she experienced in her journey toward sterilization.

“While I have many reasons for not wanting to get pregnant and wanting to be child-free —from genetics to fears and medical concerns — at the end of the day, ‘I don’t want to have kids’ is reason enough and should be respected,” she said.