A comedian is under fire for allegedly humiliating a breastfeeding mom at one of his shows and asking her and her infant to leave. Arj Barker was reportedly performing at the Athenaeum Theater in Melbourne, Australia, and Trish Faranda decided to catch the show with her 7-month-old daughter. According to the comedian, the baby was making noise and was an unnecessary distraction. He felt it prudent for his show's integrity to ask the baby to leave. The mother has a different take.
Faranda claims her daughter was not a distraction at all and told A Current Affair she was "vigilant" in making sure her baby, Clara, was quiet and those around her were not distracted. Unfortunately, the situation blew up, and at Barker's behest, Faranda and the baby left, but the mother felt humiliated.
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First, let's look at the mom's side of the story.
Faranda spoke to A Current Affair and explained that she was excited to attend the comedy show and purposefully sat on an aisle in case things got loud and she needed to make a quick exit.
"She started gurgling, babbling, but not for very long because then I just gave her a quick feed, and she was quiet," she explained.
She alleged that Barker even joked with her about Clara and said that he spoke "baby" and told her that the baby had said, "Take me outside." It all appeared to be lighthearted until it wasn't.
"Then she had a bit of a whinge; she wasn't full-on crying; I think it wouldn't even be as loud as someone coughing," Faranda told A Current Affair.
At that point, the comedian allegedly told the mom it was time to go.
She told the news outlet that Barker seemed to have had enough of Clara.
He allegedly came over to her a second time, and that's when Trish knew it was really a problem. “I was actually breastfeeding when he came and stood in front of me and he was basically telling me to leave,’ Trish said, according to 3AW Melbourne. “People were laughing and I don’t think he was joking. So I said to him, do you actually want me to leave? And he said, 'Yes I do.’
"Then he was sort of like, 'Oh no, it's really disruptive, you're interrupting my rhythm,' then he threw back to the crowd and was basically trying to get their support to say 'get out,'" she recalled.
Barker's demeanor embarrassed Faranda, who said she wished he'd just asked her to leave. Instead, she claims she was heckled by others in the room.
"It was embarrassing, you know. People were yelling out. It's not fun to walk out like that, and I don't think I deserved to walk out like that," she shared.
Barker has a different take.
He took to Instagram and had a similar story about the baby and joking with Faranda, but he said he quickly realized that the infant was distracting to him and others at the show.
"I made a difficult decision. I then calmly informed the woman holding the baby that the baby couldn't stay," he explained. "I felt bad doing so and stated this at the time as well as several times through the remainder of the show. As she was leaving, I offered for her to get a refund, as a gesture of goodwill.
He added that the show was "strictly for Audiences 15+" and that the theater should have stopped Faranda before she even entered.
The comedian also mentioned breastfeeding.
He pointed out in his post that any accusation that he was targeting Faranda for breastfeeding is untrue.
"It's been mentioned that she was breastfeeding the baby, which may or may not be the case, but to suggest that this had anything to do with my actions is blatantly false as I couldn't see well enough to know if she was or wasn't," he wrote.
Barker added, "This was ALL to do with AUDIO disruption of my show, nothing more. For the record, I support public breastfeeding, as it's perfectly natural."
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The incident caused mixed reactions.
Some in his Instagram comments wondered how Barker would have reacted if it was an adult causing issues.
"Out of curiosity: Do you ask hecklers to leave your show? How about people with coughs? People with tics? Autistic people with verbal stims? Where do you draw the line at natural human noises during a show?" someone asked.
This person criticized him for how Faranda was escorted out.
"He's missing the point again. It's not about asking the baby to leave," the person explained. "You actively let the room scream at a woman very aggressively to get the f— out. And then you made jokes about how you loved the power. We are ACTIVELY calling on men to do better to say more and you RELISHED in this moment."
At least one person supported the breastfeeding mom.
"For all the people saying who brings a baby to a comedy show. Mothers can't leave a fully breast fed baby at all. That's why," the person wrote. "It should've been more clear, if a gurgling baby is that disruptive. Also for a group of men to yell 'get the f— out' and belittle this woman is completely unfair and I don't think anyone should allow that. That's what the apology should be for."
But some who claimed to be in attendance supported the comedian.
"I was there, the row behind the baby. My partner and I saw her walk in and looked at each other. She was 4 row from the front in the middle of the row, so definitely not close to the edge like she said," one person commented. "She WAS NOT breastfeeding feeding, and hushing the baby every time it made noise so she knew it shouldn't be. I am a mother myself, a single mother at that for many years, I would never have brought my baby to a comedy show. It is not acceptable and it's very selfish. Get your baby looked after like everyone else or stay home and put it to bed. It was way past it's bed time."
Someone else understood but thought Barker could have been handled better, writing, "Fair call Arj. I was at the show and I understand your point of view. What disturbed me was the calling out and heckling of the mother by other (male) members of the audience who were being verbally abusive and intimidating.
"It felt wrong that you didn't address that," the person added. "By not doing so it felt you were condoning it. It made me feel quite uncomfortable."
