Grief is a heavy thing. When you’re going through a difficult time, it can be hard to see past your own needs and desires. After the loss of a parent, everything changes. And it can be hard to shake off the cloud of sadness that surrounds you.
One grieving mom is realizing that maybe she let her grief cloud her judgment recently. She took to the internet to ask advice after her teenage daughter blew her off. The mom was looking for a little sympathy after the loss of her father, but she wasn’t getting it from her teen. And she wasn’t getting it online either.
She posed her complaint to other moms.
The grieving mom posted on the popular “Am I Being Unreasonable” forum on the Mumsnet site. She explained that her dad died after being sick for a long time, and she has to travel to her hometown for the funeral.
“Today I need to go do some shopping, my 16-year-old daughter who has said she would come with me and help now said she would not come,” she explained.
The teen simply changed her mind.
Mom continued, saying that her daughter was still sleeping, even though it was the afternoon. She also claimed that her daughter didn’t seem to care about her feelings when she decided not to go shopping.
Since she was “so sad,” she wanted her daughter to keep her company, saying it would be “nice not to go out alone.” She went on to call her daughter “quite selfish and sometimes very rude” since she wouldn’t go shopping.
“I know if a friend asks her to go out now she would immediately get up and go. But just not for me,” the mom said, again calling her daughter “selfish” and “cold-hearted.”
People didn’t waste time dragging the mom for her comments.
“She is 16, she is not your emotional crutch,” one person scolded.
Someone else wrote: “You need some friends for this. As others have said it’s not okay to lean on your child.”
“It may be that as well as not wanting to go out with you she is feeling unconscious pressure and also pressures to look after your sadness,” another commenter reasoned. “Of course she would go with her friends — that’s what happens at her age — peers become very important, it’s just a stage. You need to look after your own self in this, it’s not her job.”
“She’s too young for you to put the responsibility of emotional support person on her,” another comment read. “Your daughter is not cold hearted or selfish, she’s being a normal teenager. It’s you that sounds self centered tbh.”
