The overprotective father is a well-known trope in movies and TV. You can see it in all types of films — everything from The Little Mermaid to Father of the Bride features a domineering dad as a theme. The dad usually goes a bit too far in trying to shield his daughter from the dangers of the world, and most of the time those dangers include any boy or man she might date, especially the one lucky enough to take her on her first date.
Although historically we’ve laughed at this type of dad, society is a little different these days. When one mother shared how her husband recently handled her daughter’s romantic interest on Twitter, she saw just how much.
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All the controversy began when Christy Kelly shared what happened when her husband met her teen daughter's boyfriend.
All of this went down on Twitter when journalist and mediator Christy Kelly shared a family moment online.
“Today my teenager’s new boyfriend, my husband, and the young man’s momma had an introduction meeting,” she wrote. Then things took a turn once she detailed what her husband had to say during this sit-down.
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The teen's dad told the young man he has 'four guns.'
“My husband told the young man: You can call me Sir. I have 4 guns, my daughter’s chastity is important, and you’ll have to see if you do anything to disturb that.”
Kelly applauded her husband’s approach. “Thank God I married an old soul. He also told the kid he can get ‘dunked on any time.’ Basketball reference!”
Finally, Kelly said, “We may look like fun ‘cool’ parents, but we are pretty traditional. The new-age parenting is stranger and frankly needs to stop,” she concluded.
People immediately pointed out the threat of violence in her husband's words.
Perhaps you can spot the red flags here already. But in case you don’t see why the internet may have had a problem, this is what people online had to say about Kelly and her husband’s warnings.
“Is your husband implying he is going to commit first degree premeditated murder if your daughter and boyfriend have consensual sex?” one user asked. Kelly responded, “Not at all.”
But the conversation didn’t end there. “Then why did he feel the need to mention the quantity of firearms he has in the [same] context as your daughter’s chastity?” the commenter continued.
Kelly offered no further explanation on Twitter but advised people to listen to her podcast on the subject.
Some reminded Kelly that violence begets violence.
Others thought there was a better way this father could have handled the whole thing and even mentioned that his threats could lead to real violence if he was not careful.
“That’s how weak men move,” one person tweeted. “There’s ways to have the respect conversation without all that rah rah, and if that young man has a father or men who care about him your [husband] may have to honor that check. Do y’all tho.”
Women worried this father might be too concerned about his daughter's sexuality.
Women took issue with the fact that this dad seems to have an unhealthy preoccupation with his daughter’s sexuality.
“Society should not applaud men for being so obsessed with their daughter’s body that they threaten other children with guns,” a doctor of clinical neuropsychology and trauma specialist wrote. “This threat wasn’t about this teen harming his daughter. Just about control over his daughter’s body.”
There were several comments about Kelly’s daughter’s sexual autonomy and it not being the concern of her parents if she is having consensual sex.
One woman, however, shared that even when young women are victims of violence, they feel pressure to protect their fathers and the violence they promised to inflict.
“My dad [was] overprotective like that too,” another person shared. “Said he’d you know what to any man that hurt me. One time a man did hurt me and I didn’t have the courage to tell my dad cuz I thought he’d flip out and go to jail. I had to protect him and suffer alone with no support. Good Luck.”
