A wise woman once said that when it comes to travel, moms who are traveling with their families aren't on a vacation … they're on a work trip. And while work trips can be fun, there is a reason the word "work" comes first. While it isn't true for all families, it seems quite common that the mom usually ends up being the person in charge of making sure everyone in the family has what they need when they are on a trip. As a newly viral video shows, sometimes this may result in forgetting clothes for one important person: mom.
Amanda Ayala, a Wisconsin mom who goes by @herky_jerk_ranch on TikTok, just went viral for a video of her wrapped only in a towel, and it totally proves this point. Ayala, who was on a camping trip with her husband and kids, went to the shower house armed with everything her girls needed to get cleaned up, including fresh clothes for them. But her husband captured the moment when she got back in the car and unleashed her frustration about why she was the only one in the nude.
Her husband thought it was hilarious.
The family was on a weeklong camping trip in Kansas when they all went to the shower house at the state park to clean up. After the showers, Amanda realized that while she'd grabbed clean pajamas for her 9- and 12-year-old daughters, she was going to have to do the walk of shame in her towel.
Her husband, Efrain, thought it was funny, turned on the camera and asked the oh-so-innocent sounding question, "Hey, why does everybody else have clothes on and you're still in your towel?"
With a look in her eyes that almost every mom probably recognizes, Amanda shot back, "Because I'm the mom. And I get everybody else's s— together and not my own. So I come to the shower house with nothing. So here I am."
She was not impressed with her husband's reply.
We can't blame Amanda for demanding to be taken home after her husband cheerfully mentions how peaceful his shower was. Because of course it was! She was the one who was having to wrangle two kids in the shower and try to get herself taken care of, too, while he only had to worry about himself!
This moment was super relatable for other moms on TikTok, including one who commented, "Yep understand this 110% just came home from vacation and forgot half my stuff but everyone else had their things," and another who exclaimed simply: "Oh man. I feel this in my soul."
TikTok is putting her husband on blast.
Although Amanda insisted in an interview with the Today show that her husband isn't "a bad guy," some folks on TikTok were quick to point out that he could probably be doing more to help out. The moms of TikTok were definitely on her side, including one who explained: "This might be a joke but.. his comment broke me. I know that feeling!! Very insensitive!!"
In the interview, Amanda explained that she thinks their marriage is equitable, but only if she does work to make sure that happens. "We don't divide household labor into a man's or woman's job. He's that husband who is like, 'Babe, I'm probably not going to see it staring at me. But if you leave me a list, I'll get it done,'" she explained.
This is the perfect example of invisible labor made visible.
We can't help put point out that if a mom has to give her partner a list to help split the work more evenly, she's still doing more work. She's still the one thinking about what needs to get done and writing it down. She still ends up essentially being the one in charge of making sure all the stuff gets done. That's called invisible labor and it can be so draining.
Amanda did share that her husband packs for himself, which is probably a step up some other families, but that means she still packing for three when he's only packing for one!
We'd say this is a good example of how things can get missed when moms have to do all the invisible labor, but we'd say a viral video (with more than 3 million views) where the mom is wrapped only in a towel, is a pretty dang visible example of the labor gap between parents.
