Admit it. There are some people you don’t like. You may not be able to flat-out tell them you hate them because you have to interact with these people a lot, so you have to remain civil. You know … we’re talking about the homeowners association president, your boss. Shoot, it could even be your sister-in-law. We all have people like these in our lives, and although you may not directly tell them you hope they have a terrible day, a bit of passive aggression never hurt anyone, right?
A TikTok mom recently shared a brilliant video of some toys that she would oh so thoughtfully give to her worst enemy’s child. Folks, take notes. These items are sure to make any parent's life a living hell.
Finding a toy for your enemy’s child is simple.
Thanks to TikTok mom Hayley DeRoche, aka @sadbeige, we have some hot leads on what’s perfect for our frenemies' kids. Think about your own home. Remember when your brother thought it was funny to get your kid a recorder when he was 3? Paybacks are hell, bro.
DeRoche introduces us to a screaming Hei Hei doll. You know, that insufferable chicken thing with the crazy eyes from Moana? This toy’s screech is maddening and a perfect token of love for someone you really hate.
The worst toys aren’t just those that make a lot of noise.
Sure, noisy toys are terrible, but DeRoche also suggests a Bop It to drive people crazy. And there’s more. Personally, we think that an unidentified horrid smell can be just as assaulting to the senses as a blood-curdling chicken scream.
The video introduces us to kinetic sand next, which promises “sweet scents” on the box. “There’s nothing quite like smelling like your middle school backpack,” DeRoche says in the clip.
Kids are unpredictable. Their apparel should be too.
DeRoche offers a scenario that many of us are familiar with: a child wandering into your bedroom in the middle of the night. That may be typical, but this time there is something more.
What if the child was wearing a terrifying dinosaur mask? Throw one of those in the cart because your boss totally deserves to have the living you know what scared out of them at 3 a.m.
Plenty of parents are in on these suggestions.
DeRoche has lots of fans because her commentary is on point, and parents agree with her painfully accurate takes on everyday life. There are so many horrible toys that exist, and parents have plenty of gripes about them.
“SIL got my kids a very loud/multi piece music equipment set last year. Tempted to get the Heihei for my niece now,” one person commented.
And families are all in on sabotoging each other. “Me and my family buying the worse toys for each other’s kids. Playdoh, whistles, slime. I won, I found army men online,” another comment read.
The 'Sad Beige' lady has a series of videos chock-full of gift-giving ideas.
On her TikTok, she showcases glitter slime, dolls that claim to be content creators, and baby dolls that cry. And of course she shares the games adults have to play with their kids. Don’t even lie. You know this can be equally as painful as stepping on a Lego in the middle of the night!
Friends and enemies, beware. Now that we know exactly what to pick up for your children that will drive you completely out of your mind, you better be nice. Or we’ll be the first in line for little Billy’s first birthday party with glitter goop and a possessed chicken in tow.
