Thong + Scotch Tape = A New Way to Lift Your Butt!

When Dr. Karin Hart looked in the mirror and didn't like what she saw, she did something about it. Like any self-respecting aging woman, the California psychologist invested in some scotch tape and went to town on her backside.

After a few strips here and there, she was able to find the perfect combination to provide adequate lift for her behind. And you want to know the good news? She's taken the science behind her taped up rear, swapped from tape to sturdy black fabric straps, and got a patent. Now, for only $29.95, you too can own her butt bra Biniki that will shape, tone, and lift your derriere!

Is it just me, or did life totally get so much better?!

OK. Sarcasm aside, this is absolutely ridiculous. While I understand a little padding here and there up top to give your girls an extra boost — the Biniki is just plain awkward. Take a look at the models here. Can you imagine undressing in front of your lover wearing this? I'd be plagued with eternal embarrassment and, well — most likely single.

I get it. As you age, it's more than likely that things start to go … south. But even if you're a culprit of the effects of aging — what self-respecting woman would put on a pair of dental floss holsters for her butt cheeks and pretend that she's A. comfortable and B. confident? Not this one.

So what's a lady to do then when the effects of aging got you down? Well, I regret to inform you that there's no magical way to get a backside like Jennifer Lopez or Beyonce. On the bright side, getting active is a much more worthwhile investment — and an added benefit, one that will have you looking better naked, too.

Lunges and squats, when done properly, work wonders for your backside and legs. AND, you can up the difficulty of these moves by adding weight. For example, instead of doing three reps of 10 squats, try three reps of 10 squats while holding two 5-pound weights. While the added weight may not feel too harsh at first, I can promise you that you'll be feeling it the next day.

I understand that not every woman is going to run to the gym after reading this. But at least do me this favor: Stop this wretched Biniki trend before it starts! If your backside isn't where you'd like it to be, at the very least opt for a pair of Spanx or body shaper before defaulting to the butt bra. Hell, if Spanx aren't your thing, you may as well stick with the scotch tape. It's cheaper than the Biniki, and according to Hart, you could achieve the same awkward great results!

What do you think of the butt bra? Would you buy one?

Image via Biniki