Do you know what I hate around the holidays? Eggnog. Eggnog is stupid and disgusting and a waste of bourbon. Or rum. Or any other booze.
It's the worst holiday drink — hands down.
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Here's how you make eggnog:
You don't.
According to Wikipedia, eggnog is is a "chilled, sweetened, dairy-based beverage traditionally made with milk and/or cream, sugar, whipped eggs (which gives it a frothy texture) and spirits such as brandy, rum or bourbon."
Are you puking yet? If not, I will do it for you.
What jerk decided that it would be delicious to ruin a perfectly good glass of bourbon by adding milk and raw eggs to it? I demand to know who. Also, you know who drinks eggnog?
YOUR GRANDMA.
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Are you your grandma?
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I didn't think so.
So, skip this milky, weird, smelly holiday beverage, and just drink a glass of bourbon neat instead. Add some ginger ale if you want to feel festive. But for the love of everything Christmasy, keep your eggs away from my nog.
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Image via Shutterstock/MSPhotographic
