It’s easy to say unkind things when you’re caught up in the heat of the moment. That’s why it’s important to think before you speak. One wife is regretting something she said to her husband during an argument. Without considering his feelings, she fat-shamed him.
Now, the wife is rethinking the way she handled the situation. But even though she’s feeling remorse, it’s too late. The words have already been said, and there’s no taking them back. And people weren’t afraid to point that fact out to her.
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The couple got into a heated argument.
The wife posted her dilemma to the popular AITA forum on Reddit in hopes of a resolution.
“Last night, I suggested to my husband that we finish off the leftovers in the fridge since we had plenty of food that needed to be eaten,” she wrote. “Instead of agreeing, he immediately countered with, ‘Wouldn’t you rather go get nachos?’ I shook my head and firmly said, ‘No.’ He then sighed dramatically, as if I’d crushed his dreams, and declared, ‘You don’t feed me.‘”
Her response to her husband's comment was clearly reactive.
“Without skipping a beat, I replied, ‘You wouldn’t be overweight if I didn’t feed you.’ That’s when the tone of the conversation shifted. He immediately told me I was being mean and that my comment was uncalled for. I stood my ground and explained that I only said it because I felt insulted by his original remark,” the wife shared.
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It's clear she has some unresolved issues with her husband they need to talk through.
The wife felt it was necessary to her post to add some “context” to her remarks. “This isn’t the first time I’ve felt unappreciated. During the holidays, my days were consumed with taking him out to eat or cooking meals for him, ensuring he had food he enjoyed. It feels exhausting to put in so much effort, only to be told I’m not doing enough,” she said.
Many people felt she was flat out wrong, regardless of his words.
“I get being upset by ‘you don’t feed me’ or ‘we never have food in the house’ remarks, but stick to the subject at hand: if you didn’t make food, aka ‘feed him,’ there wouldn’t be a plethora of leftovers,” one person wrote. “But, negative comments about anyone’s body is never okay.”
“You took what was probably a joking comment from him and responded ten fold,” another person pointed out. “Even if he was being serious your response was entirely disproportionate to what he said.”
Someone else commented: “What a cruel and massive overreaction to his comment. my goodness, do you even like him as a person? why would you hit below the belt like that in response to a relatively innocuous comment?”
“What you said was mean & hurtful,” another person wrote. “It clearly didn’t come from a place of worried about his health… If his comment bothered you then talk to him, bc why are you responsible for preparing all of his meals & making sure he’s fed 24/7 anyway. If I was you, I’d apologize for what you said (if you are really sorry) & then have separate discussion about feeling unappreciated & how you guys can fix it.”
Other commenters felt they were both at fault in the situation.
“This whole conversation was just unhealthy communication from both sides,” one person commented. “Is this how you guys normally talk to each other? because yikes.”
“When your gut response to him is to call him fat, you have communication issues,” another commenter wrote. “I’m sure he thought he was just being playful in his response, but it shows a lack of appreciation towards what you do. Both y’all suck. You both need to learn to communicate without insulting each other, and how to read each others feelings. Clearly you were already in a not great mood if his remark set you off. You even admit the tone of the conversation changed after you replied, not when he replied. Get couples counseling, y’all are gonna need it if you want the marriage to last.”
“If you feel unappreciated, that’s an issue for you guys to discuss,” another comment reads. “You already know that ‘two wrongs don’t make a right’ so feeling unappreciated does not give you a free pass to insult your husband.”
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.