My Husband Had Sex With Me While I Was Unconscious & Now I Want a Divorce

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From the time our children can understand language, we do our best to explain to them that no means no. It should be a hard stop when someone tells us not to touch them. This isn't just for children; it is equally vital that adults understand consent and that when someone is rebuffing your sexual advances, it's time to move on. It doesn't matter if you just met, are in a long-term relationship, or married. If your partner doesn't want sex, the moment is over. No one has a right to anyone else's body.

A woman posted in Reddit's Am I the A–hole forum with a positively sickening story about her husband and his behavior in the bedroom. She claims he had sex with her while she was sleeping and then lied about it. She wanted to know whether she was overreacting, and Redditors had strong opinions.

Her story is pretty crazy.

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The original poster explained that she woke up to her husband forcing himself on her in her sleep. She said she told him to get off her, and when she confronted him the following day, he denied it.

"I sat up in bed and stated that I knew what he did the night before. He lied and said he wasn't inside of me and that he was just trying to get inside of me," she wrote. "I know my body, and I know he was mid-thrust when I caught him. He claimed he has no reason to lie but the truth is he has all the reasons to lie. He's done this before 6 years ago."

The prior incident was really gross.

Not only did he have sex with her in her sleep, but he also put Plan B contraception on the table for her the next morning.

"We'd been going through a rough patch and not having sex. So I knew I didn't purchase that plan B. He stated he'd had sex with me when I was sleeping. I almost broke up with him right then and there but gave him another chance," she explained.

OP ended up marrying him anyway and the pair have two kids now. They are in marriage counseling and see individual therapists, but now she wonders if this has all gone too far.

The situation upset a lot of people.

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It was no surprise that Redditors did not like OP's husband. Some were shocked by her reaction.

One person wrote, "You made a mistake six years ago by under-reacting. Don't make the same mistake today."

Another commenter agreed. "You are UNDERreacting, if anything. He raped you 6 years ago and you stayed? Now he's gaslighting you. He's a serial rapist," the person wrote. "Honey, you need to protect yourself and your children from this man. I can't understand why you "want to keep their father in their lives". THEIR FATHER IS A SERIAL RAPIST."

This person said OP's husband has had enough chances, writing, "You know it's rape. Mostly because all the comments are saying that. Don't take him back. He's given up his chances – I know you're torn, and I wish there was more I could do.

"If you do, then he'll take it as an advantage and do it again or even something worse," the person continued. "Try to keep your distance. I know you want your children to have a father but sadly that won't be him. Collect as much evidence as you can. Stay safe."

Many commenters have no doubt that OP's husband assaulted her.

Redditors didn't mince words. They wholeheartedly felt that OP was raped by her husband, and there was no excuse for his behavior.

"That's not sex. It's rape. I'm so very sorry that he betrayed you like that, he's done it more than once and divorce is absolutely the way forward," someone wrote. "You're not overreacting. Having a sleep sex fetish is one thing but it requires discussion and consent, without it he's just a rapist."

"NTA that is literal rape. The fact that he did it twice already raises enough flags. He has no common sense and no respect," another comment reads.

And this person told OP to get out fast. "Run. I am so sorry. I think we come here to find the answers we KNOW are true. You gotta get out of there," the person wrote. "That hurts my heart, and he is a freak. How can you do that to u?! 2 kids? Marriage? He had a plan b 'waiting' for you?!!! Like no no no. No. I could hurt him."

Sadly, this isn't as uncommon as we would hope.

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Redditors who experienced the same trauma cautioned OP to get help.

"That is rape. The fact that he admitted to doing it several other times, and this is the second time you've consciously found out… no no no. I'm so sorry this happened to you," one person wrote. "My boyfriend in college also did this to me, and I under reacted. It's been almost 7 years and I wish I could go back to tell 18 year old me to report it. Sending you big hugs and all the strength."

Another shared her scary story, writing, "My boyfriend did the same thing to me. But first I asked him for a Tylenol. Thinking he gave me one. Come to find out, he gave me a sleeping pill. I woke up in the middle of him raping me for the 3rd time in the night. Yes Rape! I did not give him my consent.

"I tried pushing him off me, he be very upset about the whole thing. I was Traumatize I could not forgive him and broke up with him. I ended up in counseling for a year. It's been 8 years and I do t think I'll ever get over it!" the person continued. "I loved him with all my heart and trusted him. To this day, I don't trust any men. I can't even date or get close to a man for fear of being drugged or raped. I'm sharing my experience… I wasn't married to him or had children. I tried to go to counseling with him, but he refused. I've learned my lesson with men, to only believing there actions not there words."